Before I knew it all these questions came to me like,"he would never do that if he left us right? Or would he? Wouldn't my mother have told me?" He has to be lying. He has to be. But why would he?"What satisfaction could he possibly get?"
It took me awhile to answer,"You're lying. She would have told me. What reason would you have for asking about me anyway? It's not as if you care because if you did you would have been right here with me. And you're not."
"Lyss..I mean Calyssa you don't understand, so you don't know about anything that happened. Your mother is gone and since you have no one left you will have to come and live with me, I may not have been there for you as a father should have been but I'll be damned if anyone says I didn't try."
My mouth had gone dry. I felt as if I had the wind knocked out if me. I'll be damned if I have to go live with him and his whore and two precious children. I am not a child anymore. I am sixteen years old.
But I'm not eighteen and that means I can't live on my own.. I either went to foster care or went with my dad. I wonder which one is worse, living with the very people he left me and my mother for, or going into the very system that fucks people up. Geez what a choice I get to have. I guess I'll have to go live with him... wait a minute where does he even live?
"Where do you live?" I muster. Looks like I am going to take baby steps from here on out.
"California, where do you live?"
"Well I have to come and get you don't I?"
I think about it, technically I can drive myself. Because luckily before mom went to Afghanistan she had the good sense to get her will in order. Crap I still have to look at that don't I?
I remembered he's still on the line so I say,"No, I can drive myself. I just need your address."
He responds,"Oh that's right you have your mothers car don't you? Okay well my address is 3457 Miars Plantation. When will you get here?"
Miars Plantation? What does he live in a mansion or something?"I live in Florida. So it will take me about 1 day and a half."
It doesn't take long for him to reply,"Oh hell no. No way am I letting my daughter drive that far. I am putting you on a plane no discussion. Understand? You will leave at eleven in the evening tomorrow and I will send you the plane information and ticket."
I sigh into the phone,"Fine. What about all my stuff?"
"I will send a moving truck and they will deal with everything. What time is it? Oh, it's 6 in the evening. Okay, they will arrive there in an hour to help you. Alright?"
And then we both hang up the phone. I didn't even think about all the friends I will be leaving! All the drama and stuff I've went through with my friends will have all been for nothing. In fact, I'll probably never even see them again. I know that's what happens in life when you graduate from high school anyway, but it's different when you're moving across the country to a different high school where you don't know anyone.
They are going to have a field day with me. I decided to go on Myspace, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and post that I will be moving tomorrow to California so anyone who wants to hang out now or tomorrow to contact me. I sigh as I shut down my mac laptop and make my way to my mother's...or what was my mother's room down the hall. I peek my head inside the crack and decide it's now or never. I enter her big but cozy room and head to where I know she kept her will and jewelry in her safe in her closet.
I inhale a deep breath as I open the safe with my birth date as the code, not very original mom. It clicks before it opens and I slowly open it. I start to take out the contents and look through them. What lies before me is what I'm guessing are pictures, money, her will, and her jewelry. The first thing that I decided to look through are the stack of pictures in front of me, to be honest it seemed like the least painful thing to go through.
I start to look through the pictures and I see pics of what I'm assuming is me as a baby in her arms. I find myself smiling as I flip through the seemingly large stack of pictures, and to no surprise tears well up in my eyes. No not again, no more tears tonight. You need to be strong, I tell myself. That's when I notice that it isn't just my mother holding me anymore, there is a pair of big hairy hands sharing me.
It's an fairly attractive young man with beautiful brown caramel eyes. I'm awed at first, and then I think wait a minute who is this guy? I flip to the back of the picture and in familiar cursive handwriting it says "Rob and Calyssa when she was a couple days old."
I drop the pictures, but then feel guilty and put them back in their original order. I then find myself closing the safe before walking out of her closet and into her bathroom.
As I enter the bathroom I stop and look in the mirror. I definitely look more like my mother. I have my mothers dark brown hair, while my dad has blonde hair with tanned skin. I guess you could say the only thing we all share is our intriguing eye color. I notice though, that instead of my brown eyes, puffy red eyes are replacing them.
I look away, and look toward the bath. It has candles around it and bubble bath soap next to it, this was the usual setup for my mother. My eyes travel back to the mirror and I automatically discard my shirt. Leaving me in my bra and shorts, I gaze up and down my body feeling a since of pride that I got my mothers curves. I'm about 5'3 which was slightly taller than my mothers height. Next I slowly start to take off my shorts.
Still gazing upon the mirror as I do, I look at the now exposed skin. The only thing keeping me now from being completely naked is my laced bra and matching underwear. I discard the rest of my clothing and look at my naked body in the mirror, am I not skinny enough? Am I not curvy enough? Or am I just how I'm supposed to be? In this era you're either skinny or fat, there's really no in between, at least not in society's eyes.
I turn around and twist the faucet all the way to the hot side and pour in bubble bath as I feel the water go from cold to warm to hot, just like my emotions. I go back to the mirror, brush out the knots in my hair, put it up with a clip, and then I wipe off the mascara that was drooping down my face to my cheek bones. Once that is done I turn back to the tub and slowly get into the boiling hot water, ignoring the burn I feel as I sink into the water. The faucet is still running, so I reach to turn it off.
I let the hot water wash away my nerves, at least for a little while and I think back to the pictures of my father. A pang of irrational guilt treads through me for being so rude to my father on the phone, but what was I supposed to do? I hadn't heard from him directly in 10 years...and I don't remember much from my childhood when he was there. I just don't understand how a father could do that to his one and only child. How can you leave your only daughter who was six years old for another women and her children. I start to feel depressed just like when I was younger, damn it. It took me three therapists and Alison to get better. Maybe a foster care would be better for me since he already screwed me up...I just don't know anymore. This is too much.
Hey guys! I hope you liked the first chapter! Comment what you thought! Don't forget to vote!(: On another note, the song of this chapter is Just One Yesterday by FOB.
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It's Now or NeverFantasy
Young Calyssa Conner has been living a normal life with her mother ever since she was little. When her mother suddenly "dies in war," she will have to move with her father whom she has not seen or heard from in over ten years. Her world will change...