Chapter 17

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I roll over onto the bed and off of Josh. Did he just tell me no? Wow. I always assumed I'd be the one saying no. Okay. Wow.

"Hey, I didn't mean to-"

"No. You're right. It's cool." I say quickly interrupting him. I turn onto my side facing the wall, facing away from my boyfriend that I was just about to lose my virginity to.

"Indigo," he starts but I don't want to talk because I don't trust my emotions. I'm too confused.

"Josh, no. It's fine. Honestly, we should just go to bed." I say tightly. I feel him shift beside me.

"No," he says simply. Then I feel his lips on my shoulder, right where my tattoo is. I shiver a little and suppress a sigh of delight. I have to be strong. I can't let him know what he does to me. "C'mon, Indigo. You know I love you. Just at least look at me so we can talk."

I consider my options then turn to my other side. I see a small smile playing on his lips. I can't help but grin. I lean forward and press a kiss to his lips. I forget all about the fact that he just said no to me and I deepen the kiss. He pulls away and I frown.

"We need to talk before we do anything. We've never talked about this before." he says. I can't tell by his face what he's thinking. I sit up and cross my arms across my chest. He sits up and faces me.

"What do we have to talk about?" I ask quietly.

He sighs. "Indigo, I love you so much. I just don't want you to do anything you aren't ready for. I want you to be sure."

"Josh, I've never been more sure about something in my entire life. I know how I feel, I love you. I love you so much. I'll never regret anything that we do, as long as I'm with you. You just make me feel so safe. I want to be with you."

As soon as I finish talking, he leans forward and puts his arms around me. I kiss him with more passion than I've ever had. I know this is right. I love him. He loves me. We deserve each other. He lays me down and hovers over me. I run my hands up and down his chest. He rests his hands on my hips underneath the fabric of my shirt. He spins me around so that his back is on the bed and I'm on top of him. He pulls me closer and I feel his hands travel farther up underneath my shirt. His lips softly brush my neck. I run my hands lower to his stomach and even lower so that my thumbs are underneath his pants. We kiss and I explore his mouth with my tongue. Finally I move me hands to his and help him take my cami off. Then I move my hands back down to his waist and slowly slide his pants off. He kisses my stomach and I exhale with a shiver. He grins at what he's doing to me. I kiss him barely able to control myself as we remove the rest of our clothes.

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I wake up smiling. Josh's arms are around me and it's the best feeling in the world. I remember last night and smile. I turn around and kiss Josh. He smiles and opens his eyes.

"Good morning, Beautiful!"

"Morning," I say and then roll over I grab the sheet and walk towards the bathroom. "I'm going to shower, we can get on the road in an hour or so?" I ask smiling.

"Sure. Take your time, Love."

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"Okay, I got us to Marshaville. Now direct me to Jess's house."

I do so and start getting really nervous as we pull into Jess's driveway. What if Jerry knows I'm back? What if Jess doesn't want us here? What if Josh and Jess don't get along? He grabs my hand.

"Relax, Indigo, everything will be fine. I'm right here, you're safe."

He's right. As long as Josh is here, everything will be okay. I take a deep breath and get out of the car. Josh takes my hand and intertwines our fingers as we walk to the front door of Jess's house. Before I could knock, Jess opened the door and met me on the porch.

"Indie, oh my God!" Jess exclaims pulling me into a big hug. I let go of Josh's hand and hug her back. "I can't believe you're here!" she beams.

I smile back at her. I really have missed Jess.

"Oh. My. God. Indigo Renee Lawrence! Did you bring a boy home?"

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