You Needed Me- Snowbarry/FlashFrost (COMPLETED)

Home Sweet Home

You call me 'evil' because you think I'm bad. I call you 'twisted' because you think you're good.

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Caitlin's POV

I rushed home after the conversation with Barry and began packing my clothing into a large suit case.

Tears started streaming down my cheeks. I looked in the mirror and I saw smudged mascara, messy hair and a broken heart. 

I took the earrings out of my ears and the makeup off of my face, touching my skin and examining my entire body wondering why I'm not good enough. Forcing a smile on my face and trying to telling myself that "hey, who said he doesn't love you? You're a vital supply to the team" "you may not have him to yourself but at least you have piece of him"

Suddenly my eyes changed to the colour blue and my entire room got cold. I emailed Cisco that I'll be out of town for a few days then booked a flight to go to Alaska. Maybe I can become friends with wolves.

After the 3 hour flight, I went to the little cabin I booked for a week. Simply away from everyone, away from him.

I was surrounded by snow, miles and miles of miles of snow and I've honestly never felt more alive. It's not hurting as much, my heart feels a little relieved. Maybe it's not so bad after all.

I jumped into a pile of snow and began playing with my powers. Creating snow flakes, stopping the snow flakes mid air and sliding on the snow. Sometimes I forget that these powers are not evil. Sometimes I forget that I actually adore and love them.

My phone started buzzing and I rolled my eyes as I saw the caller I.D., I cleared my throat and tried to sound as professional as I could. "Yeah Barry?" "CAITLIN! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!?" I quickly removed the speaker from my ears. Oh boy, he's upset.

"I'll be back in a week or something", he tried to calm down his temper but I could feel the anger and rage through the speakers "I asked you a question. which. part. are. you.?" He stressed on every word implying that he's not very happy with my choice of leaving.

Okay so maybe I chose a Alaska because Barry is not very good at running on snow and maybe I turned the area I am located into a skating rink so that if he tries to come and get me, he will fall.

"I said I'll be back in a week or so Mr. Allen" I replied sternly trying to show that I'm not in a relationship with him so he has no right to get this angry.

I could hear the loud grunt he made and it sounded like he threw a chair to the wall or something. Who knew he had a dark side. Ha. Maybe he's good at covering it up.

I accept all of him,the good and the bad because that makes him who he is. I love him.

"Caitlin, it's Cisco. Where are you?" I sighed because he gave the phone to Cisco "I'm in Alaska, don't worry about me okay. I just need some time to think" giving him a reassuring tone. 

"YOU COULDNT HAVE SAID THAT IN THE BEGINNING?!" Barry shouted. I'm on loudspeaker. Great. "WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING IN ALASKA?"

"Okay Cisco, I'll see you in a couple days. Trust me. I'm fine. I love you guys. Take care and try not to destroy the lab while I'm gone" then hung up the phone.

No more games please. I went inside and curled up on the bed. I don't want to play any more games relating to love. You don't love me yet you care so much that it drives you insane. You don't love me yet you worry about me all the time.

I don't want to play "he loves me but he's confused" or "he loves me but he doesn't want to accept me" dammit. I'm tired. I'm drained. I'm weak.

Finally, I'm about to sleep peacefully. I close my eyes and all I see is him. He's laughing, he's sad, he needs my help. All images of him in my head, engraved in my mind and heart.

Yes, I'm tired and I don't want to love him anymore. Another piece of me wants to believe that he's worth it.

I'm going to sleep Barry Allen and I hope that piece of you thinks of me before you fall asleep. A tear escaped my eye as I realized that the only way I'll be able to sleep tonight is if I accept that he's my lullaby.

Even if I'm not your lullaby, tell me that you love me, tell me a lie.