Meraki

Dear Eva

My hands trembled

Flitting across

The wrinkled paper

Someone pushed into my fist,

The writing almost illegible;

My surroundings dissolve

Her voice fills my ears;

"Dear Eva,

My dear daughter.

Grown up so soon!

It seems so close

When I was still young

With you on my hip

Your brother in his pram

While I made your food

You'd always compete

For the loudest cries

Making a mess

Making me laugh

Exhausted, but happy I was.

Then soon you were crawling,

Walking, running

In a hurry

Towards your later years;

Off to college,

Away, away from me.

I suppose

In college

You were too busy

For a letter

And you must have had

So much on your mind

Planning the wedding

(What was his name again?)

You simply forgot

Little ol' me,

And I guess

The little ones

(I know how crazy they can be)

Didn't stop running around

For you to get a picture.

But I did wish

To see my only daughter

One last time.

I write this

With you filling my mind.

But I guess

Karma found me in the end.

I remember my mother's tears

When I left

For good.

I didn't think...

It doesn't matter now.

Dear Eva,

Please know I never would

Hold anything against you

But if you do find some time

Come see me, if you can.

Take care, daughter

Be well

And good luck."

Time seemed to slow down

The whispers around me

Loud once again

The hands patting my shoulder

The thin-lipped smiles

I receive

Everything seems surreal

I hardly hear

The words spoken to me;

I'm sorry for your loss..

As I near my mother

To see her

One last time.

xx