bitten ➼ calum hood au

07

i know i told you goiz that this book is currently on hold but shit man i cant even hold myself

songs for this chapter:

bonfire heart - james blunt

hero heroine - boys like girls

save your heart - mayday parade

"everyone wants

the flame

but nobody wants

to get burn"

[07] fixing

michael

The night Jourdan turned before my eyes was a sight I would never imagine. She was so furious and aggressive for an Omega. I understood her then, because she haven't seen the full moon for over seven months. I wasn't surprise to her sudden lust for blood that night, she even tried to kill me. I struggled on stopping her from killing anyone else by sacrificing myself. For a newborn werewolf, it was rare for me to see blue eyes glowing. She had blue eyes when she transformed and I remember Caleb (Calum's father aka the greatest alpha of alpha's) told me about werewolves with blue eyes, he told me it was a reminder of their innocence. And Jourdan was all innocent before this ever happened to her. But despite of the innocence of her glowing blue eyes, she was in fact, beautiful for a shewolf. She was fierce and I almost shit my pants when she went to attack me. It was my first time to feel frightened over an omega, I always thought I was stronger but Jourdan herself, made me feel weak. 

"In deep thoughts?" I jolted from the roof and turned my head to look over my shoulder, to see Jourdan looking out from the window of her bedroom.

"I was looking for you, thought you were off to work." She smiled. She just woke up from her deep sleep base from her messy hair and pale face. I shook my head no and gave her a small smile, returning my eyes to the blinking stars above me. Adoring them as I still can.

"You want to join?" I ask back at her and she nods her head, climbing out of her window and walking towards me carefully.

"You're afraid of heights?" I noticed. "How'd you know?" Her face confused, sitting and wobbling before me as I guide her. "The way you stare at the ground and wobbling, squeezing your eyes shut- it's quite obvious, really." I replied, chuckling deeply to her act a while ago.

"Really?"

"Yes, really."

"Michael?" She called for me, surprising me for she called my name for the first time, she used to call me Mike and it's very strange to my ears. A nice kind of strange I think.

"I want to apologize." My head spun to face her and she kept a straight face, maybe she was trying to say how sincere her apology was.

"For almost killing you, I mean." She nervously laughs, avoiding her eyes on me as I glued my gaze on her.

"You don't have to apologize, it wasn't your fault." I chuckled deeply. Shaking off the fact that she almost killed me that night.

"I almost killed you, I really have to apologize for what I did."

"I know, but you didn't mean to, did you?" I raise my eyebrows, her eyes widening to my response.

"I.. I didn't mean anything of that to happen."

"Now you got my point, don't say for something you haven't done in purpose." I smiled toothily, looking back at the stars then back to her.

"Well, atleast, accept my apology. The guilt is building up on me, you know. It's very hard to look at you and remember the things I've done to you." She smiled weakly, brushing off the strand of hair that fell to her eyelids.

"Okay. Apology accepted, you feel much better now?"

"Yeah." She sneered, her dimples showing and her cheeks colored crimson. She is so fragile to suffer so much pain from all this, she deserves so much better.

She deserves me.

"Jourdan, do you still remember the night we met in the woods?" I said, scooting closer and hoping that she won't notice my gesture.

"Yes, I guess? The night you attacked Calum, he hit his head on a rock." She said, making me cringe.

"Actually, Calum started it and he just hit my nerves right away. I didn't mean to-" I cut myself off as long as I notice the scrowl on her face.

"Okay, can we please move on?" I smiled, she nods and bit on her upper lip.

"Do you remember what I told you before? About fixing?" Her eyes went back at me and she seemed really shocked.

"I didn't turned the offer down yet, I mean, if you want some fixing- I could lend a help." I nervously said, taking deep breaths and hoping that she won't take this the wrong way.

"Michael, I don't want to assume but I'm afraid that I'm taking it wrong." She chuckles, shaking her head as if she cannot believe me.

"It is what you think it is, Jourdan."

"Michael!" She whined, embarrassed.

"Tell me what you think." I answered, quite serious now.

"No, you tell me what you mean." She countered, a small smile plastered on her face.

"Look, Jourdan. Don't ever think that I'm taking advantage of you, I would never ever do that. You deserve so much better, Jourdan. You don't deserve the pain he's causing you. You got through so much now, you became a werewolf yourself and you suffered seven months without any contact from the outside and now you come back, Calum being insanely out of his mind, not capable of remembering his imprint. Your parents hunting you and suffering from a broken heart. All of this shit sucks, right? Even if I wasn't experiencing all of this, I am able to see how everything goes and how things get fucked up and from here? I don't think it's getting better." I paused for a while and breathed heavily before I took a glance at her.

"Jourdan, I'm not telling you to give up on him." She sighed and bit her lower lip as a tear rolled down her cheek. I was fighting every urge of me to wipe those tears away myself.

"I'm telling you not to give up on yourself. Look, you're slowly falling apart and I can't stand seeing you like this. I'd rather choose the old Jourdan, hating on me and head over heels in love than this, fake smiling and heart breaking. You were so much better when you were together and I would do every fucking thing possible to bring Calum's memories back but Grayson's nowhere to be seen and he's that only chance to get Calum back to you." My hand travelled to hers and I was thankful enough that she accepted my touch. As I expected, her hand was soft and God, I would love to hold her forever if possible. I interwined our fingers together and gave her a gentle squeeze.

"I would try to fix you. If you let me. It's just hard to see you so miserable." I hissed under my breath, hating the fact that she has gotten like this.

"Michael, you know that I still love Calum right?" She looked up to me, tear stained cheeks and I took the chance to wipe them off.

"Absolutely. But I wasn't asking for love, Jourdan. Love is such a big thing I have to deal about and I don't think I would risk the freefall. I'm talking about fixing. Fixing you and only you. Don't think about me, I can handle myself more than you could possibly think of." I smirked and she chuckles softly, her eyes glancing from my eyes to my lips.

"Do you wanna try?" I ask, my voice breaking due to the low tone of my voice. She didn't answer a word but nods, her face leaning in as I copied her action.

a hella of a filler babes wtf michael you have to fix me too

but do you ever ship michael jourdan? i have to know goiz.