The Roommate (boyxboy) -DISCONTINUED-

Chapter 6

Again I’M SORRY! This story just keeps getting pushed away *huffs* Anyways I’ll try writing more asap :)

Sorry if this chapter sucks I literally had to force myself to write it… :S But at least its 5 pages on word :D

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Elliot’s POV

I’m a slut and I have a boyfriend. That’s smart. And to think only hours before I almost said I hated him, that I wouldn’t choose him to fall in love with in a million years. Things sure change quickly.

After our steamy shower, heh nice pun, I decided not to tell James what I was thinking before he came in. I didn’t want him to know I was contemplating suicide, I didn’t want to tell him he was my savior because honestly, I wasn’t sure how he’d react to that. He could put me into an insane asylum for god sakes. As we laid on my bed, with my head resting on his bare but warm chest, I couldn’t help but think about things.

What happens now? I can’t just stop being a slut, I mean sure I could since I have James now but what about Josh? He literally relies on me, which is really disturbing and gross, so when he finds out…what will he do? He’s easily twice as big as James thought it’s not like I’d ever let them near each other, and even bigger to me. I’ve had him hit me a few times in the past, which I brushed off to the guys as some stupid fight I got into because I ‘stole’ some guys girlfriend. And let me tell you, it hurt, a lot.

Come to think of it; I’ve never been in a relationship; my first kiss was when I was drunk at 14, with someone I can’t for the life of me remember. I can’t tell you the gender of the person as horrible as that sounds. That night was also the night I started selling myself, it started off as kinda a cry for attention but now…it’s become even more.

I sighed and looked up at James; his pointy elf like nose, intelligent green eyes, perfectly shaped lips and model like cheek bones made me melt as always. He is perfect in every way. Meanwhile I’m just some disgusting ugly whore who really has no good traits or skills like James. Why does he want to be with me? Kiss me, touch me? Is this just a game? No. I’m thinking too poorly of him, he’s smart, he knows what he’s doing and he’d never do anything to hurt me. I’m just being too self conscious, again.

“I’ve never seen you like this before,” James suddenly spoke; the vibration from his chest filled my body with warmth. Not warmth of lust, of love; of feeling like the happiest guy in the world just to be able to lay like this on him, knowing he wants to be with me. “You’ve always been so hyperactive, like a windup toy that never stops but now…” I looked up at him at his pause; he was looking down at me with curious eyes. “You make yourself out to be like that as a mask…why? Why do you hide your intelligence?”

“Intelligence?” I blinked at him, now sure of what to think. Intelligence? Me being calm and serious shows my…intelligence? Sorry to burst your bubble James but I’m far from smart, obviously. A smart person would never sell themselves out like I have; a smart person wouldn’t act like me at all.

“You put yourself down too much Elliot; you’re smarter than you think.” He grabbed me underneath my arms and lifted me to his waist; I leaned down to rest on his chest as he watched me. I know he’s right, well about the putting down part, but I can’t help myself since it’s the truth. I’m not smart like James, I didn’t grow up normally, I have any other friends beyond these walls, I look sickly and to be honest I don’t feel like an actual human being. There's no reason to feel good about myself.

“You’re just saying that to be nice, I’m not smart. Look at me James; I’m selling myself out for ten bucks.” A tiny pang of disappointment crossed his features, but it washed away so fast I wasn’t sure if it was imagination or not; I wouldn’t doubt he’s disappointed in me.