Authors Note in BOLD like ALLLWAYS
"What is it aunty dearest?" Braxton called out sweetly from the kitchen table.
"OH MY!" Petunia repeated herself. There was a crash from the kitchen, and everybody ran to go see what was going on, even the pack whore, Monica, who had somehow untied herself from the chair.
Oh come off your high horse. (NEIGH)
"WIFE!" Bob screamed. "Are you hurt?' he scooped his wife off of the floor, where she had been laying in shock.
"Eww, old people love."
"Take this." Petunia shoved the phone into my hand for some reason.
"We're gonna kill everyone in your pack!" a scratchy voice said. "THIS IS OFFICIALLY WAR!" the man hung up.
What? Don't you think somebody would have figured out about werewolves if they are always having wars?
"Who was that?" I asked calmly, giving the phone to Braxton to put away.
"Nobody important, just our neighbor pack who have been our nemesis for 3,098 years and have vowed to kill everyone anyone in our pack has ever loved. Like I said, nobody important." Bob shrugged.
WHAT THE FUCK?!?!
"Cool." I pursed my lips. "So...what's for desSert?"
"Milkshakes! Strawberry is my favorite!" Braxton squealed, helping his aunt up off of the floor.
WHY IS THIS RELEVANT NOW?!
"So what should we do to prepare for the war?" Braxton added.
"What?" Bob asked, mouth dripping with pink liquid.
"I don't remember." Braxton scratched his chin.
Fuck off.
I reached to grab the pitcher of milkshake shit, when suddenly, out of nowhere, a wolf with wings flew into the kitchen, shattering the window.
Umm...what?
"Llana..." the wolf thing said.
"OH MY GOD IT'S THE MAGICAL UNICORN LUNAR GODDESS BITCHFACE LUNA EGG SALAD WOLF LUNAR WOLFSTAR GODDESS GODDESS WOLF WOLFO BARK BARK MEOW BARK MAGIC WOLF!" Bob shrieked nonsensically.
I've read books like this where there is some sort of magical wolf god who's name is about as dumb.
"Who are you?" I gasped, falling out of my chair and seizuring.
Was that really necessary.
"Didn't you just hear Bob? My name is MAGICAL UNICORN LUNAR GODDESS BITCHFACE LUNA EGG SALAD WOLF LUNAR WOLFSTAR GODDESS GODDESS WOLF WOLFO BARK BARK MEOW BARK MAGIC WOLF." the flying wolf thing said. "But you can call me MULGBLEWLWGGWWBBMBMW for short. Or just Mulg."
Mulg is such a majestic name?
"And I'm here to tell you, Llana, that you are special." Mulg bowed her(?) head.
We know.
Braxton gasped.
OMG WHAT NOW YA BISH?!
"Does that mean..." he stuttered. Mulg interrupted him;
"Yes, Llana is going to be the next SUPER ULTRA SAVIOR WHORE-ASS-BITCHFACE HERO OF EVERYTHING PLUS JUPITER AND QUEEN OF THE CRICKETS, LORD OF THE WORLD, PROPHECY FULL FILLER MOON GODDESS WOLF BEYONCE." Mulg said, flying away.
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN NEXT?!?!
The END OF CHAPTER 13!!!
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The Worst Story Ever (Wattpad Cliches)
Random**A Wattpad Cliche** Cover by @thatcyrusguy I actually love Wattpad. It is a really genius idea. But, I'm sure that I'm not the only one who searches for hours upon hours (okay, ten minutes) searching for that perfect non-cliche book. Thi...
