when you got home you were quickly met by the other hard working men. you could see yoongi icing the finishing touches on the cake while hoseok took out a pint of frosty cream.
and there apparently had been votes going around about who would fall asleep first, everyone except jimin voted for you; he thought yoongi would be out of it the quickest.
you and tae quickly joined into the buzz of life and wouldn't speak again until after the festivities ended and you were still up in the living room, watching tv.
taehyung stepped in front of the television set, hands folded together in front of his body. his gaze on the fuzzy carpet.
pausing your show you looked up to taehyung, moving your legs off the couch to sit forward."is everything alright?"
he sucking in a breath of air until it turned to a steady stream like whistle, guilt dropping from his sighs. "yeah...of course."
he stops, chewing on his bottom lip as he tries to meet your gaze, changing his mind just as quickly."no. I was unprofessional today–there's no way to excuse my behavior."
"I had a great time, I don't understand."
"I got upset and my full attention wasn't on you. those jerks got in my head and I ended up cracking and jumping off the cliff trying to entertain their mess."
"I'm not supposed to be insecure around you." he presses the flesh of his finger to his eyes, smearing the tears unevenly on his face.
forcing a nervous laugh he looks away, lifting up the bottom of his shirt to wipe his face.
"see i'm doing it again—gosh I don't want you
to think i'm not good at this, I just have a soft heart y'know?"
"I smile and look goofy all the time but my heart is so sensitive and wrecked and I don't know how to tough it out."
he sighs, crossing his arms over his chest and trying to face the window, in an attempt to keep his composure.
"friends are always saying, aw what does taehyungie do for a living? ah prostitute, prostitute oh yeah."
"then they say, oh you get paid to cheat on people? taehyungie is a playboy?" he paused ruffling his now poofy hair.
"and I tell them to stop–that it's not funny but they just keep laughing and poking fun of something that I'm so proud of."
you tilted your head, your heart aching a bit at the thought of something you love to do being judged so harshly and without understanding
"I was so orange when I started working here."
"yeah..you know, sunny, bright, warm..that ball of excitement you get when doing something, that tingly kiss on the cheeks in the summer heat. I imagine those feelings as the color orange."
he finally locks eyes with you.
"I guess my point is that what I did was unacceptable and I just want to do better. rita I promise I'll do better on our next date."
"wait is that what this is all about?" you scrunched your nose and shook your head
you couldn't take it. you couldn't take these secrets, these different faces these guys put on everyday. you didn't like knowing that on one side they were hurting but on the other they spoiled you rotten.
in made you even angrier because had there been something in those files then you would've know already.
and in your anger you called everyone back.
"I don't want a perfect boyfriend guys. I want a guy who's as flawed as I am, to have struggles and issues that he has to work through as well—and he still loves me through it all. that's the type of guy I like."
"and if you all try to put up two different faces around me; a fake smile here and at night you have to work through your own issues, then I won't let you be around me at all. I rather not have any of you than pretend like you're perfect and not offer you a shoulder to lean on or a friend to vent to, I won't."
"rita you don't understand.." jimin shook his head, biting the thick flesh of his lower lip. "we're supposed to make you a priority..that's our job, be perfect in a world of imperfections."
"we'll make the acceptation for me, leave or let me see who you really are because I can't stand to see another one of you cry because you held it in too long."
your eyes shift from jimin two taehyung, two of the six whoever broken down just for you to see.
"that's all I have to say..."