The Longest Five Years (Completed)

Reagan, cont.

"Yes," I say. And with Emmy around, it's a little easier to accept. I'm doing this for her and everything's going to be fine. I've only known her for a few days, but nearly everything about her reminds me of him. It's not hard to see why Erin's in so deep.

It's a short ride to the hospital, but Emmy fills the gap of silence with chatter about her day, and it melts away any awkwardness.

"And then Chloe said I can come over for a playdate, but I told her my Daddy is hurt and I have to be home to take care of him and then she asked what happened so we all made cards for him in class and here's mine and do you like it and..."

Holy shit. I'm looking between the road and my rearview mirror where she's holding up a folded up piece of lined paper with crayon drawings of an injured Luke with really blue eyes. Nailed it.

"Pretty. I'm sure he'll love it," I manage, before she continues on. And just as my nervous had settled, we pull into the hospital parking structure and the butterflies resurface.

Emmy clutches her card in her hands and I suggest she leave the rest in the car so she doesn't lose them. Together we stride into the hospital and right to the elevator, where she begs me to let her press the number 4 to take us to his floor. She's been here several times with Erin, but I haven't been back.

The elevator dings and the doors fly open. She takes off down the hallway like a bat out of hell, darting around the corner. I chase after her, like an idiot, apologizing to nurses and staff along the way. Before I can catch up to her, she's found him. I reach his door, and glance in with wide eyes. He's upright in a wheelchair, dressed in a pair of dark grey sweatpants and a turquoise v-neck t-shirt. Emmy's in his lap with her arms around his neck, and he looks up when he hears me walk in. Our eyes catch and I'm out of air again; I won't pretend it's from all the running.

"Hi, Reagan," he says simply and my arm bends up at the elbow in an awkward little wave.

He kisses Emmy on the top of her head and tries not to cringe when she hugs his middle, but I see the pain. His accident was pretty bad; he's lucky to be here.

His eyes never leave me. I used to dream he'd look at me this way again.

"So can we go now?" Emmy asks as if there isn't this monumental moment passing between us.

Right.

I blink a few times to clear my head.

"The nurse should be here in a few with the paperwork, then we can go home," he says to Emmy with a smile before focusing back on me.

I can't take much more, but thankfully the nurse appears right on time. She's mid-50's and friendly, and as he makes jokes about going home, she chuckles. He's still so charming.

Did I really think I'd get through this without saying a word? Now I just seem like a bitch. He signs multiple forms and take the prescriptions from her hand.

"He's been a real trooper here. Good company," she says. "But we're glad he can go home with his family. You take good care of him now, okay?" She says to Emmy, and she nods in excitement. "He'll be okay," she says to me softly as if I play a big role in his life. "Make sure he takes it easy and cut him a break if he's a jerk for awhile. Pain will do that to a person."

I smile and my eyes shift to him when the nurse suggests I bring the car around to the emergency room drop off doors.

In the few minutes I have alone in the car, I seriously contemplate leaving, but my conscious gets the best of me.

As I pull car around and open the door so the nurse can help him get in, I realize I can't just drop him off at his house and leave. I think about calling Erin for an update on her car, but concentrating is hard enough with him just a few feet away; I don't need to be on the phone, too.