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i tell myself, the voices in my head everyday since he's been with us,
that i don't go let him go yet.
like all my other precious kittens they made me let go of.
maybe if i just, make the imprint on his arm,
more apparent.
everyone will understand that he's more.
he's different.
he loves me.
he wants me.
of course, he needs me.
after all, we did something new.
i tried something new.
i let him out of his play pen.
and into my room.
where i left no spot untouched,
where he begged me for more kisses
for more touching.
this time, it worked.
my plan worked.
once you have someone wrapped around your finger, they never leave.
until you make them.
maybe there is small chance that i want him gone.
i just can't shake the feeling of killing.
i miss it.
i miss dragging all sorts of knives across their soft,
pale skin.
and watching it slowly, cut through.
watching the blood spill out onto the floor.
the aroma of blood filling the dark room,
the panicked eyes of my kittens who always struggle.
i never understand why. they knew better than to think i would treat them any different.
jimin is just blind.
i can't leave him unharmed with no bruises and cuts.
he should know he only has one more day before the real fun starts.
he already has a few from our special night,
the handprints and purple marks on his neck.
the small burn marks that he enjoyed getting so much.
who knew, that someone so innocent, could come undone for someone like me.
so easily.
i'm not a monster,
i'm not insane,
i'm not in love,
i'm just,
a not so secret admirer.
who has the urge to make sure no one else can ever get what is mine.
✍︎
lol what the fuck is this chapter
psa only one more chapter left
