This will be the last chapter
Shrek and the loaf of bread had been together for several years now.
They were now standing at the altar at their wedding. The loaf of bread stared in awe as it saw it's soon to be husband walking down the aisle.
Shrek was wearing a beautiful gown. The bread would have teared up at the sight, if it had tear ducts. When Shrek got to the end of the aisle it looked at his lover with tears in his eyes and said
"I love you."
The loaf of bread was overwhelmed with emotion. He could tell that his friends and family and even the whore Fiona supported their relationship. All of their friends knew they were in love.
"Do you, Shrek, take this bread to be your lawfully wedded spouse?"
"Do you, nameless loaf of bread, take Shrek to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
The loaf of bread did not respond, as it is a loaf of bread.
"I now pronounce you husband and bread."
So that's my extremely fucked up fanficiton! Shoutout to Liam for the idea.