Keira: Chapter 4

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I jogged downstairs and saw Ricardo sitting at the table eating, Tiara was laying down on the sofa watching tv and she smiled at me once I walked in. I smiled back and sat down opposite Ricardo, he hadn't looked up from his cereal and I cleared my throat.

'Ricardo-'

'Be ready at 12 so we can leave school, yeah?' I nodded slowly and sighed, he'd been avoiding me since last night. So we nearly had sex, what was his problem? He left the room and took the bowl with him. I rolled my eyes and put my hand in my blazer pocket, I felt a piece of paper so I took it out and saw it was one of those help leaflets, mental disorders. I scrunched it up and threw it in the bin and Tiara looked at me.

'Morning Keisha.'

'It's Keira, Keira not Keisha okay?' I said and laughed, and she nodded, I knew she'd still end up calling me Keisha so there wasn't much of a point.

'Have you met my mum yet?' She asked.

'Nope, I haven't seen her.'

'Mm... I haven't seen her either, Ricardo said she was out working. I miss her.' Aww, bless. I hugged her and Ricardo cleared his throat.

'Aye Keira, we've got to go.'

'Erm okay I'm coming.' I said back and he's already left the room and I heard the front door shut, I raised my eyebrow and picked up my bag and put my shoes on. I shouted bye to Tiana and ran out the house and down the road, I can't believe he left without me! I caught up to him and looked at him in disbelief.

'Did you seriously just walk out the house without me?'

'Mm.' He mumbled back and I grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

'Ricardo, what the hell have I done?! You're acting SO off with me for no reason and I want to know what I've done now!' I shouted and he shook his head and turned around to walk off. I hit him in his back and he turned around and looked at me as if I were crazy.

'Are you stupid?'

'No I'm not! I just want to know what I've done, this is SO stupid!'

'Look Keira, I don't want to take advantage of you in this state so we can't get close like that again alright? I'm being serious, I was so tempted to right then and I don't want to be the one who-'

'The one who what Ricardo? The one who slept with the psycho girl? The psycho girl who slits her wrists?! You're JUST like everyone else, you judge me and you swore you wouldn't do that but you fucking lied!' I shouted and walked off, how dare he! He was one of the few people I trusted and he said he wouldn't ever judge me but he lied. He lied to me. I got to school and went straight inside, I was walking down the corridor when I heard my name being shouted.

'KEIRAAAA! KEY WAIT UP!' I stopped in my steps and saw Sarah running towards me, she smiled at me and I looked back at her blankly.

'What?'

'How many times do I have to apologize? You were right about Luke he's a dickhead and he was only using me for one thing Keira, I'm so-'

'You're not sorry! You don't know what it means! Just shut up and piss off.' I said and walked off into form. She got on my nerves so much and today really wasn't the time, I was tempted to miss the appointment I had with the psychiatrist as I simply didn't want to be with Ricardo. School was so boring at then 1pm came, I went to sign out and Ricardo was waiting for me at the front gates, I walked straight past him and continued walking.

'Do you even know where you're going?' He asked following me.

'I can figure it out.'

'No you can't, you're going the wrong way babes.'

'Don't 'babes' me, just take me there and I'll find my way back to your house.'

'Ite then, I will. You're so stubborn.' He said and laughed, I wasn't in the mood to buss no jokes. He stopped laughing and held my hand, I shook my hand free of his grip and he sighed.

'I'm sorry Keira, I was being dumb and letting what everyone else was saying get to me.'

'That's NO excuse Ricardo. Just take me there before we're late.'

'Ite man.' I rolled my eyes and we caught two buses to some next area I didn't recognise. I followed behind him as we walked to the building and we went up to the front desk. He told them my name and they said they were ready to see me, I went into the room and Ricardo closed the door behind us.

'Hello Keira I'm Dr. Jacobs.' The man said and held his hand out, I shook it wearily and sat down. Ricardo sat next to me and I glared at him.

'Leave.'

'Wha-'

'Just go! I don't want you in here.' He kissed his teeth and left the room. I couldn't stand him being around me right now. The doctor first asked me a few questions and then he started to ask me personal questions.

'So do you have any reason for why you started slitting your wrists?' He asked with his pen ready to jot stuff down on that flipping notepad.

'I don't know... stress.'

'Stress of what exactly?'

'Family, school, friends.'

'Has anything happened at home that's disturbed you Keira?' I frowned and then bolted out of his office and down to the waiting room, Ricardo looked up alarmed and I stood infront of him breathing heavily.

'WHAT DID YOU TELL THEM!?' I shouted and he held my arms.

'Nothing... Keira, what are you talking about?'

'YOU TOLD THEM ABOUT TREVOR! YOU DID DIDN'T YOU?'

'Babe calm down... people are looking.' I looked around the room and the people that were there were looking at me weirdly.

'WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL LOOKING AT?!' I shouted, pissed off by their faces. Ricardo dragged me back up to that doctors office and he was still sitting there in shock.

'Keira, I can already see what's going on.' He said and I turned around to face him with my eyebrow raised.

'You're showing symptoms of depression, from what Ricardo's told us with the drug overdose and you slitting your wrists.' I slowly sat down on the chair and Ricardo sighed and sat next to me.

'Keira, I'm so-'

'Is there anything that can help with the depression?' I asked ignoring Ricardo, the doctor nodded and started typing something in on his computer.

'If you take this down to reception they'll hand your tablets over and I'll be calling you in roughly 2 weeks time.' He said and smiled, I nodded and we went down to get the tablets. We left the clinic and slowly walked home, I felt crazy. They had named my mental illness. I felt scared of myself and I just wanted to be rid of everything, my illness, Trevor and my sisters condition. I still had to deal with it all, whether I wanted to or not.

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