The Fat Bitch Diet

Chapter 20 - Scene 1

❶❼⓪ Lbs

December 6, 2016

After I was moved to the general ward, the guild was allowed to visit me all at once. I learned from Betty that they'd taken turns sitting with me while I was in the ICU, but I was asleep whenever they came in. I hadn't seen them since before the accident and was excited to see all of them. And Christos.

Staring at my shiny new wheelchair, I was nestled in my new bed when Shaniqua burst into the room, followed by the rest of the guild. I clapped in excitement as I saw each of their beautiful faces.

"I missed you guys so much!" I said, trying not to tear up. "Where is Christos? Actually, wait, let me apply some lipstick before he enters."

"Honey," said Vik, "lipstick isn't going to help. You look like you were transferred from the psych ward."

I reached into the wooden bedside drawer, where the contents of my purse were dumped. "Trust me, it's no ordinary lipstick. It's a beautiful lusty red color that I discovered off the rim of a used Starbucks cup."

Vik gave me a look of disgust. "Eww... Viola."

"Relax, it was in a Ziploc bag."

"Ziploc bags are very tough," said Remy. "You would be surprised to see how much pee they can hold."

I puckered my lips, gliding the lipstick along my chapped mouth. "Okay, go get him. I'm ready!"

Vik shook his head in confusion. "Get who?"

"Christos, of course!" I said, tilting my head flirtatiously for his arrival.

"Okay, first of all, when you tilt your head like that you look like a constipated chicken. Second of all, Christos isn't here. He's still MIA."

"Huh? What are you talking about? He came to see me in the ICU. He told me he loved me. Wait a minute." I grinned devilishly. "Are you guys playing a joke on me? Is he hiding in my bathroom? I hope not, cause let's just say this hospital food is not making my bowels smell like potpourri."

"Viola, we guarded the ICU the whole time," said Vik. "Christos never came. You must have been delirious."

My eyes widened in shock. "No, he was there. I remember because his face was fully shaved, too."

"Okay, now I know you were hallucinating for sure," he said. "Christos would never in a million years shave his beard; that thing took forever to grow."

I looked over at Shaniqua, who was quietly staring out the window with her arms crossed against her chest. "Shan, aren't you happy to see me?"

She slowly turned around, revealing fire in her eyes. "I need a minute alone with Viola." The boys quickly scurried out of the room.

Smiling, I teased, "Are you coming over to give me a big hug and kiss?"

"Bitch, have you lost your mind?" I forgot how loud Shaniqua could get when she was furious. "Viola, you nearly died."

"That wasn't my first near-death experience. I once choked on a strawberry during food sex."

"Girl, I'm not in the mood for your jokes right now." Shaniqua took a deep breath and sat down next to me. "If I ever catch you texting and driving again, I'm going to snatch your phone and smash it into pieces on the pavement at the next red light." She gave me a stern look and said, "You got it?"

"Got it."

"Good," she said, leaning in to hug me tightly. "If you need anything, I'm here for you. We're all here to get you through this." Shaniqua yelled into my ear, "Boys, you can come back!"

Remy and Vik entered with a large tote bag, pulling out the second most important item in my life, the first being a roll of toilet paper.

"My laptop!" I cheered with excitement. "This is perfect! my cell phone got busted in the accident and I'm behind on my Facebook stalking." Vik passed it to me. "Actually, can you put in on the wheelchair?"

An awkward pause filled the room.

"Okay, let's address the elephant in the room. I have a wheelchair now. It's not a big deal. I'm looking forward to accidentally running over Janette's toe."

Remy whispered to Vik, "I don't see any elephant..."

Shaniqua grabbed the bag from Vik. "We have more for you." She dug into the bag and pulled out several bottles of supplements, including the sweetest nectar of them all.

"Aminos! Oh my God, I think I just had a mini orgasm." Hugging the bottle like a newborn child, I asked, "So how's the marathon training going? Isn't it tomorrow?"

"Like the state of your hair, it's a disaster," said Vik.

Shaniqua added, "Vik is right, at this point we just hope we can make it to the finish line. We can only last three of the seven miles on a treadmill.

"I had to run to the bathroom multiple times," said Remy.

"To puke?" I asked, feeling concerned.

"No, I had diarrhea."

Setting down the bottle, I said, "You guys got this. I know you will make it to the finish line. I'll be cheering you from here."

"When are they releasing you?" Vik asked.

"No clue. They have to make sure the apartment is wheelchair accessible. I don't even think there's a ramp outside of the building. I may have to move."

Shaniqua grabbed my hand. "Girl, if we have to carry your ass in through the front door, we will."

A short woman in scrubs popped her head into the room. "Sorry, guys, visiting hours are up."

Vik waved. "All right, Viola, we'll see you tomorrow. Enjoy the laptop, and please run a comb through that hair."

"Don't worry, I have a plastic fork I saved from dinner that's perfect for the job."

Shaniqua gently touched my shoulder. "I left my number with the nurse. If you need anything, you let her know."

"Can she bring my dignity back? Cause the doctors saw my goods in the ICU, and let's just say I'm not expecting any positive Yelp reviews."

Remy was the last to exit the room. Before leaving, he asked a profound question, taking me completely by surprise. "Hey... how come you don't make anymore videos? I miss them."

I pondered the question, sitting alone in the room. Was it time to return to the online world? I'd abandoned my YouTube star status as it had become too distracting, but really, my fans were the ones who had given me the initial motivation to lose the weight. 

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