The 20 Disses

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THE 20 DISSES

#1 : Words can't describe your outfit, so I'll just throw up!

#2 : They can't measure your intelligence. The scale won't go that low.

#3 : Appearances can be deceiving. Or in your case, disgusting.

#4 : I promise not to make fun of your height. I would never stoop to that.

#5 : I'm glad you're tall. It gives me more of you to dislike.

#6 : I think you stepped on something smelly. Like your feet!

#7 : I've seen tables with nicer looking legs than yours.

#8 : Are you going to eat that apple, or gum it to death?

#9 : Your mouth's the perfect size... for your foot.

#10 : I've seen a nose like yours before, but it looked better on the baboon.

#11 : Know what I like about your face? Me neither.

#12 : Know what goes best with a face like yours? A paper bag.

#13 : Why don't you do something different with your hair? Like, wash it.

#14 : You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.

#15 : You'll never use your mind. You can't lose what you never had.

#16 : You've made this date something I won't forget... no matter how hard I try.

#17 : I know why they call this a "blind date." Because now that I've seen you, I wish I were blind.

#18 : You're like disposable diapers...always getting dumped.

#19 : ''What are you doing Friday night?'' -->''Trying to forget you just asked me that.''

#20 : "What's he got that I haven't?" "You want it alphabetically?"

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