He passed in my arms in an instant.
Holding him in my arms, I didn't want to let go. I cannot say how long I held him. Night had turned to day, I didn't notice until much later. I didn't even notice the ornaments had gathered around me. They were all crying, but also comforting me in their own sweet, little way.
Day turned to night and it began to finally sink in that he was gone. My beautiful, tragic Geroux was no longer of this world.
Overwhelmed with grief, I wasn't sure if I attempted to scream, wail or cry. My entire body was filled with agonising sorrow. When I opened my mouth, instead of making any human sound, I howled.
The sorrowful howl of the beast within.
The beast that is me.
The beast I will be forever.
The curse I must now carry alone.
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