'That is crazy.'
Every room of the aquarium was dimly lit, the glass tanks reflecting onto the walls. He loved how the warm turquoise of the water accentuated her smile.
She hit him playfully, her arm still on his. 'Hey!'
His expression softened and his cheeky grin formed a line. 'I know what you mean, though.'
'You do?'
'Yeah.'
But he knew he couldn't tell her. Not now, not ever.
'Maybe we met in another life or something.'
She agreed, but her smile fell. 'Right, right.'
They continued their walk and found themselves in the aquarium tunnels. This time they weren't linking arms, but holding hands.
It felt so normal to hold her hand again. They hadn't done it in ages and he missed it so much. Her hand was warm and soft and fit in his perfectly. He didn't know how he went so long without it.
He liked it. He liked watching her look over everything; watching her observe the tanks and the creatures within them. It was his first in-tank experience, but it mattered so much more because she was with him.
A shark passed over their heads and they stopped to admire it.
Her body faced Jungkook's now, both of their heads hanging to see the creature.
'Jungkook...'
'Yes?'
'Did I forget about you?'
He was speechless. Looking down, he noticed her eyes were full of tears. 'What?'
'I did, didn't I? I forgot about us.'
He tried to laugh it off; tell her how ridiculous that sounded, but her face hardened and he could feel her grip tightening on his hand. 'Jungkook, were we in love?'
'That's-'
'Jungkook, please. I don't remember a single thing but this - you - have felt so familiar to me and I just want to understand. Did I love you?'
Did she love me?
He remembered asking himself that several times. So many doubts had clouded his thoughts that he didn't remember either.
Silence hung in the air. He wasn't sure how to answer, but eventually settled on the one thought that gave him peace of mind:
'Yes, you did.'
He could feel her heart drop.
'You loved me and then forgot me, but I dealt with it. I know it's not your fault and I knew it wouldn't make a difference if I told you and that's why I didn't.'
She was silent.
'I never told you because I knew it would break your heart as much as it breaks mine. I knew how much it would hurt you to know how many times you've asked my name or asked if we knew each other. It saddens me every goddamn time but I'm coping.'
He prayed the tunnel would mask his tears. 'You forgot that you loved me and that's okay. I understand you won't be able to love me ever again but that doesn't mean I have to stop loving you, right?'
Her sniffling stopped him from continuing. 'Jungkook,' her breath was trembling, as were her hands. 'I'm so sorry. I'm so so so so sorry for forgetting about you - for hurting you.'
One of her hands caressed his cheek, her thumb wiping away the recurring tears.
'But you're right; it doesn't make a difference.
I'm sorry,
But you have to forget about me.
About us
Just as I did
Because as much as I want to, I can't love you like I used to.'
And she left without another word, leaving him by himself once more.
He was just glad the lighting was hiding his tears.
***
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forgetting him | jungkook
Fanfiction❝I don't want to forget this feeling of being in love.❞ Jungkook's girlfriend has short-term dementia and he would do anything to make her remember him, but he knows it would break her. He knew that because it was breaking him, too.
