Chapter 59

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This chapter is so shit I'm so sorry, but I'm wayyy too tired to be writing a full on chapter right now, and I haven't had the best of weekends... I'm sorry. But I didn't want to break my promise of updating.

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PREVIOUSLY:

“…The reason I refused you the right to see your family was because I was scared. Scared they will manipulate you and make you hate me; but I didn’t realise I didn’t need them to convince you to hate me, I’ve already done that myself.” 

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Evelyn stood there, dumbstruck

She didn’t know what she should say; she didn’t know what she wanted say. Harry had warned her to be cautious of the way she behaved around Zayn. She shouldn’t provoke him; but what he said was true.

She stood there silently, not knowing whether she should agree with him or lie to make him happy. She felt like she owed him the truth, and the truth was what he wanted to hear, but Evelyn wasn’t sure.

The two stood silently staring at each other before Zayn broke the silence.

“Do you think you can ever forgive me for what I have done?” he asked bravely with hope sparkling in his eyes.

Evelyn didn’t answer, her eyes just dropped to the floor. But Zayn wasn’t stupid, the gesture itself was enough for him to realise what her answer would be, and it broke his heart knowing how he had ruined his chance with Evelyn because of his selfishness and curse.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered after another pause. “I wish I could love you the way you love me, but I just can’t… not after everything you’ve done to me. Zayn, you took so much from me. My freedom, my family, E”—she stopped herself before she mentioned Ethan’s name. The wound of her act of betrayal, running away, was still fresh, and she didn’t want to pour more salt upon it. “I’m sorry.”

Zayn smiled darkly before crossing the room to stand in front of her, his face looked neutral, but Evelyn could sense that sense of danger behind it.

Once he was just a few feet away from her, she tried to take a step back, creating the distance between herself and him. But he caught her around the waist before she could take more than one step away from him.

“Don’t be afraid of me,” he whispered, leaning down to kiss her forehead. “Please don’t be afraid of me.” His tone of voice sounded more like a plea than a statement, like he was begging her. “I suppose told you about the acts of torture he endured whilst being locked up in my dungeons?”

A chill slithered down her spine. She had been trying to keep that piece of information out of her head. As much as she knew she had to, she didn’t want to believe Zayn would do such thing to Ethan. Even after everything he had done to her, she still wanted to think the best of Zayn. She had to force herself to believe there was a makeshift of a person under all his demons. She wanted to give him the benefit of doubt.

“He told me,” she admitted, not meeting his eyes. “I never thought I’d say this, but please tell me Ethan lied. Please don’t ruin my last ray of hope of redemption for you.”

“You believe there’s still hope for me?” Zayn chuckled, not bothering to hide his surprise. Hesitantly, he placed his hand on the side of her face, his thumb stroking over the soft, pale flesh of her cheek. “You are so naïve, you know that? You have to be a fool to believe there’s any chance left for me… I’m a lost cause; it will only be a matter of time until I fall into the depth of darkness and insanity. If I’m not yet a monster, then I will become one soon enough.”

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