Confession #11

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Confession #11: Sometimes when you face the reality of life, you realize how horrible the world is and you really are helpless.

Okay yeah so a lot of things happened in two days... was that the last time I wrote on this??? Idk... TO ALL YOU LHFWG FANS I HAVE STARTED A CHAPTER BUT IDK WHEN I WILL FINISH... I am very busy.

Anyways, people have been so freakin' rude to me. I mean SERIOUSLY! I know it's part of life and blah blah blah, but you know, I wasn't even being rude. That sort of hurt me... you know like when you get a papercut and it stings temporarily and you are like Ouch! That really hurt! Better get a bandaid! And then not even a hour has passed and you're good to go. Yeah, that's how I felt.

You know that dude in robotics who gave me crap about setting the robot in jackstands and called me stupid. GUESS WHAT? Yup. He gave me crap again. So yesterday was Valentine"s Day for me...


Anyways, so yesterday we had to work really hard because we host this thing called Duel in the Desert, where teams all over Arizona come and practice their robot on a practice field, a field that is similar to the actual competition. SO, they planned to host it at our school and it was really fun, we had karoke night! :P

Okay getting off task here.... Our robotics club president, she told me to work and ask if the builders need any help on building the robot. Our goal was to finish with the robot, and have everything mounted on the robot before Duel in the Desert (which is today).

So you know, I asked everyone if they need help, I stuck around five minutes outside and looked around, helped them keep the metal sturfdy while they were drilling. They later didn't need my help. So I went into the workroom and asked the people working on the electrical if they needed help. They politely told me. I still stuck around just in case they needed my help you know? So I stayed.

Then, I decided to ask if the people working on the shooter if they needed help. They said no. I still stuck around and watched. The dude (shall I call him the rude dude? hahahah that made me laugh lol :P) was struggling to put this black connector thingy. So here was our convo:

Me: *looks at them struggling* Hey do you want me to hold that so that it will be easier for you guys?

Rude Dude: Taz. Does it look like we need help?

Me: *decides not to speak but gives him the look*

Rude Dude: Okay it probably looks like I need help but still. I got it you don't need to ask me for help. GOSH! NOW GO DO SOMETHING SOMEPLACE ELSE!

I left.

OUCH! That stung like a papercut, I had little tears stinging in my eyes. SO I brushed them off, swallowed the lump I had in my throat, and smiled. I was pissed. But I made myself calm down.

He will always be a stuck-up bish. ONE day he will need help and everyone will be away from him. THAT is when he will realize that he has been doing the same thing to others.

From now on, I will still be nice to him and help him. I don't care when he shoves me away.

Anyways, today was duel in the desert and we had a long day today from 6:30 am to 5:30pm I am exhausted but I need to let got of my emotions... ya know?

Oh so I was talking to my brother about getting my permit. I really didn't know he was busy. And he was like "Can you talk to this later? I am a little busy here." I told him that I was sorry and that I didn't know. He was like "You never know."

ummmmm ouch? Yeah I think so.

I am fighting insults. I am fighting this. I will, I can, and I shall.

I AM NOT FRAGILE. Reality sucks but you gotta get back up.

I am really pissed at the both of them. But not so much anymore. I forgave them.

OHHHHHHHHHHH SO I SAW MY BFF AT THE DUEL IN THE DESERT AND I WAS LIKE YAY! We didn't talk because we were both busy. Idk if he saw me.... probably not. Oh well.

I think he is losing contact with me by just saying he is "busy" I will cherish every texting convo I have. No matter how short it is.

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