I woke up and made my way to work. I looked on my desk and notice the papers that were piling up. A secretary would be nice. I asked my dad if he can find me one and he said there's already people who applied, he was waiting until I asked to showed them to me. I went through them and stumble across Jisoo's application. Why does she want to be my secretary for? Didn't she just finished college.
I gave her a call and told her to meet me. I decided to go to a small cafe around the block. She enter the cafe with a big smile. I don't understand why she would even be happy to see me. "Sowon!" She said. "How's you get my number?"
"I saw your application you put in. Why do you want to be my secretary? You finished college." I said looking at her.
"I want to be near you. To know why oppa likes you so much." She said. "Can't you just let me be your secretary? I promise I'll work hard." She begged.
"How'd you know I'm working there? We don't talk and I'm not one of your friends." I asked as she nodded.
"Jin told me. He said he took you home yesterday."
"Aren't you mad? I mean he had no business taking me home but he still did anyways." I was worried she'll be hurt but I rather tell her instead of lying to her. It'll make the situation worst if I keep it in.
"No why would I be? Jin is Jin, he'll do what he want anyways, I won't be able to stop him. So it's okay."
"Well you are his girlfriend?" She looked at me and laugh. She opened her mouth but I decided to cut her off. "Yeah so you don't find that weird? I mean at least I do."
"No it's not weird at all. Unless you feel uncomfortable towards me then I understand that."
"No no no no, it's not that I feel weird around you but..." I couldn't bring myself to finish what I wanted to say. She's a sweet girl if she can be around me then I can to. What me and Jin has was in the past. I should let it go now.
"Okay. You can be my secretary. You can start work tomorrow and make sure to come right at 7 okay." Her eyes widen at my response. She wasn't expecting this at all I can tell from her face.
"Thanks you so much! I promise I won't let you down." She reached out her hand for a hand shake. "I'll have to tell Jin about this. Thank you once again." She said bowing to me.
After the meeting with Jisoo was done I went on my car and went back to work. I stayed a bit later at work to try to file as much paper as I can. I looked up at the clock noticing it was getting to late, I called it a day and made my way home. When I got home someone was at my door. "Jin?" I said and he came up to me.
"Why did you want Jisoo to be your secretary?" He asked.
"She told me she wanted to." I said.
"No! I won't allow it. Tell her you cancel the deal." He said.
"Why are you mad? Do you hate me that much?" I said.
"I don't hate you. I just don't want Jisoo to be around you. If she's around you all those feelings I push away will slowly come back." He said looking at me.
"What are you saying? You have Jisoo now." I was confused as to why Jin would even say that.
"I just don't want to like you again. I can't stop myself from liking you. I'll be lying if I say I move on."
"You said we're my friend. We put our feelings away already didn't we? Why would it come back?"
"I never did stop loving you. I know it's crazy and stupid of me but I can't stop myself." He said. "Seeing you doing well without me I know you don't need me anymore but I.... I still want you."
"What are you even saying!" I slightly push him. "You have Jisoo! You can't be doing that to her. Why are you always like this. I thought you grew up but it seems like you didn't."
"That's the sad part. I thought I could move on but I can't. You know damn well what you mean to me. Back then and even now, you know how I feel!"
"Jin that was all in the past. Let it go, now the feeling we have for one another is only as friends. I only see you as a friend now." Jin shake his head. He wasn't able to accept anything.
"Then answer me, did you ever let me go?" He asked.
"I did long time ago. When I realize you won't be coming back. We shouldn't hold onto these unwanted feelings. I don't want it and you clearly shouldn't want it. You shouldn't listen to it. It's pointless."
"Look if it makes you feel better Jisoo and I we aren-" I cut him off.
"Don't even say you guys aren't dating because she cares about you and she loves you. She cares for you and always want the best for you." He let out a laugh. I don't see anything funny about this at all so it only made me furious.
"I don't understands how any of this funny?" I stare at him as he let out a chuckle. "Seriously stop it Jin you're messing with a persons heart here."
"I know she cares for me and I do to but not in that way like I do for you. Never will I look at her like how I look at you. You don't really understand Sowon, Jisoo and I aren't really anything. I promise."
"What are you even saying Jin!" I shouted at him. "Why are you going to hurt that precious girl. You know she's all about you. Why will you do this to her? This won't put you in an awkward position but me."
"That's why you need to listen to me Sowon."
"No I won't." I got my keys out ready to go inside. I didn't want to listen to his lies anymore.
"Please Sowon. You never listen to me back then. Just listen to me now. I promise I won't take long just listen."
"No Jin what you're doing is wrong for Jisoo. I know it and you know it too. No one deserve to be hurt like this. We both know it's wrong. You said you're happy. So let it be."
"I only said that because I didn't want you to feel bad for me." He said. "I'm not happy I'm miserable without you. I was never happy without you. You're the only one I want." He grabbed me as he pull me into a hug. It was the warmest hug I ever received from anybody. He still have the best ones yet.
"You're all I ever needed even now I still only need you. Please Sowon don't turn away from me again." He lowered his head to lay on my shoulder.
"No Jin this is wrong." I said trying to move away from the hug. "We can't be doing this. I won't be doing this not with Jisoo in the picture." I said when I finally got his hands off me.
"Why why? Why can't we ever just be happy. If you just listen you'll know that Jisoo understands beca-" He said and I cut him off.
"No! This is wrong no matter what Jisoo is to you." I said
"Why don't you listen! You never listen to me!." He half shouted.
"Because we weren't meant for one another." I said looking at him. "You even said it yourself just understand that and know why we won't workout okay?"
I open my door going inside. He pulled me and crash his lips onto mine. He kissed me roughly and I tried to pull away but his grip on me was to tight.
My eyes widen at the shock what the hell is he doing. He let go of me and looked at me. I slap him hardly in the cheek. "Are you crazy!" I shouted at him wiping my lips.
"Sowon." He said coming closer to me he lift his hand to touch me.
"Don't touch me Jin. Ever again. " I said with tears falling from my eyes.
"Sowon I'm sorry." He said coming closer to me. I move away and grab my door.
"Save your sorries for Jisoo." I said closing the door on him.
I can hear Jin shouted and knocking but I choose to ignore it. He isn't mine anymore and if I accepted his feelings, it would leave Jisoo's with a broken heart. That's the last thing I ever want to do.
YOU ARE READING
When Will I Matter? (Rewriting :))Fanfiction
Sowon was madly in love with Jin. Her best friend Eunji knows about it to. One day Jin approaches her to talk to him, did he finally notice her? Warning: Everything in this book is all made up. The whole story is fictional so don't take everything t...