The Dream That Was

History - 1976

It was a lazy summer afternoon and Horatio was bored. He decided that he wanted to explore the attic in the old farmhouse. He had not been up there in a few years. When he and Dagny were younger it was their favourite hangout, but they eventually grew out of it.

When he reached the top of the stairs he noticed how dusty the attic was. Clearly no one else had been up there in years. It seemed like it was a time capsule, left exactly as it was the last time he had been there.

The attic space was one large unfinished room under the eaves. There were cobweb-covered windows at each end, and dormers facing the front to let the light in. Horatio thought the room looked a lot smaller than he had recalled. But then again, he had grown taller since.

Clustered around the edges were boxes and bags storing things that he and Dagny had grown out of. Horatio then noticed a box that had a label that read: CHILDREN'S TOYS. He walked over and lifted the lid. Inside he saw his old teddy bear. He picked it up and looked at it. Over the years, he had worn down the fuzzy fabric that covered the bear. One of the eyes was hanging from a thread. Horatio hugged his bear. The foam that was inside had denatured over time so it made a crunchy noise when he squeezed it. When he released it the bear stayed crunched up. The bear's nose was completely convex now and the face was nearly flat. The whole arrangement nearly looked frightening. Horatio put the bear back into the box and tried to wipe the image of his deformed bear from his mind.

On the other side of the box were the Lincoln Logs that Brendan had given him for his sixth birthday. After the trauma of having his father absent for the day passed, they became one of his favourite toys. Horatio thought of Brendan when he was younger. The two of them had known each other for so long. They grew up together in Urbia. When things were tough, he always knew Brendan would be there. He could not survive without him. Horatio thought about how lucky he was to find such a perfect boyfriend. He not only loved him as a life-long friend, but he also loved him as a partner.

Horatio lifted up that box to reveal another toy box underneath. Inside this one was his model train set. He picked up the locomotive. It looked so old fashioned. Engines had changed in style since he was a kid. Underneath the tracks he found the buildings that he placed on the periphery of the rail line. The train set used to be set up on the floor of the attic because it was so large. He was in charge of the trains, while Dagny placed the buildings around the line. She used to pretend she was a developer like their dad. One year their father gave them a scale model of the old farmhouse that he had made. It was a perfect reproduction with realistic details like shutters and windowpanes. The two Cohen children loved the gift. Horatio looked through the box to find the house. But it was nowhere to be found. Maybe Dagny had it, Horatio thought.

Suddenly, Horatio's eyes caught sight of something on the floor behind the box. It was covered in dust and cobwebs, wedged between two rafters. He moved the toy box and reached in to grab the object. He winced as his hand tore through the cobwebs. He tried not to think about the spiders that he may come in contact with. Then he got a hold of it and brought it forth. It was a beautiful hand carved box. Inlaid in the wood small pieces of Amber glistened. Horatio blew off the dust and let his hands trace the carvings. His curiosity could no longer hold; he just had to open the box. Inside he found a leather-bound book. It too was beautiful and was embossed with the image of a howling wolf. In the background was a castle. Horatio knew that the book was very old and very special.

When he opened it, Horatio discovered that it was a sketchbook. On the back of the cover was inscribed the name ELENA. He flipped through the book and admired the intricate sketches. They must have been of Lithuania, as the buildings looked very old. Underneath one he saw the word VILNIUS. He knew that Vilnius was the capital of Lithuania. One of the sketches was of a large synagogue, another of a castle. They were absolutely beautiful.

He continued flipping the pages and marvelling at the images. On one of the pages was a sketch of a small wooden shack. There was a man with a beard standing in front of it. He was smiling and holding an axe. Underneath Elena had written KANADA. Horatio thought it was strange that she spelled it with a 'K'. Maybe that was the Lithuanian way to spell it, he decided.

The following pages were of fields, and of the bearded man clearing the woods and then farming the land.

On the very last page was a sketch of the Cohen farmhouse. It looked a little different, but Horatio could tell it was his house. The front balcony must have been added later, he realised. He also remembered that his father had told him that the house had been built onto many times to make it what it was today. In front of the house was the bearded man again. This man must have been Elena's husband, Juozas. Even though it was a sketch, the details were phenomenal. Horatio looked into the eyes of the man. They were his father's eyes. They had the same look of passion and pride that Sandford had. This man stood in front of the Cohen farmhouse, that he had built, and he had the same look in his eyes as Sandford did when they built the first house in Urbia. Elena had written a word in English under it. It simply said HOME.

Horatio thought about how important the old farmhouse was. It held the past within its walls. It fostered Sandford's dreams for a new city. He had continued the same passion to make a place of their own as his ancestors had. Horatio thought about how special Urbia was. It was the greatest gift he could ever receive. Horatio truly loved Urbia. It would forever be his home. This was the land that his ancestors chose for their family. Horatio's roots ran deep into the ground. Just like a tree would die if its roots were severed, Horatio could not bear to be detached from this place.

For a moment, he had this strange feeling of loss. It was as if he had lost Urbia. But how was that possible? He shook it off...but somewhere inside he felt the uncomfortable feeling that maybe he would have to leave someday.