Three days...

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Dear Diary,

      It's been three days since Dr. Green kissed me.  I haven't got to spend anymore alone time with him since the morning after.  He is always at the hospital when he isn't at school.  I think Mr. Blackbourne knows we kissed but he hasn't said a word to me.  He just gives me a knowing look. I am such a nervous wreck around the guys.  I keep waiting for one of them to say something, anything, but they never do. 

       The night after the kiss, I was supposed to stay with North at his trailer. However I ended up with Luke instead.  North said he was busy, but was he? Luke was the same Luke as always, we had ice cream sundaes and watched a movie.  Then last night I was with Kota and Victor.  Kota was with me doing homework and left as soon as Victor got here.  He hugged me goodnight but couldn't leave fast enough.  Victor came in and said he was tired and turned his back to me and went right to sleep.  They are never like this.

        I think I am going to confess to everyone this is eating me alive.  I need to schedule a meeting with Mr. Blackbourne to see how I should do this.  The thought of North or any of the guys being mad at me makes me sick to my stomach.  What am I going to do?  I can't lose them.  I don't regret Dr Green kissing me at all, but I am starting to wonder if I am destroying their family.

Kota is beeping g2g ...write more later....

OK...I am back...

        So since I wrote you last, I had my meeting with Mr. Blackbourne and he assured me that everything is fine.  The guys are aware that Dr. Green kissed me, they aren't mad.  They are confused and don't know what that means for them.  He asked me to be patient and give them time. They are having a family meeting tonight at Nathan's.  I was not invited so I am sitting in the attic looking at all the pictures of my family.  I feel like my heart is breaking into pieces.

        I think I am in for another long sleepless night.  I hope they still want me with them after the meeting.  Why does my stomach have to be so upset, now I think I am going to be sick.

Goodnight for now
💙 Me

Hey it's me again...

       North just texted and said he would be spending the night with me.   That's a good sign right?  I am so happy to get to see him outside of school.  It's been almost two weeks since we have hung out.  I am scared but excited....💗

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