"Harry, I'm fine," I assure my protective boyfriend. "I'm used to it."
"I'm so sorry, Clara. It was horrible of our fans--"
"Your," I correct him.
"They're your fans. Not our fans."
"Fine, It was horrible of my fans to do that. How are you so calm about this anyway?"
"Do you want me to be upset about it?" I ask. "Harry, I'm used to it. They just got overexcited. It's not a big deal."
"But they through a banana at your face!" Harry says indignantly. I roll my eyes.
"Hazza, I'm fine," I promise.
"Hazza?" Harry raises his eyebrows. "Since when do you call me that?"
"Sorry!" I squeak, embarrassed at my fangirl outburst. "I don't know why I said that, I just--"
"It's okay, love," Harry laughs at me.
"I bet you can't go a day without kissing me," I whisper as his lips near mine.
"I bet you're right," he murmurs as his lips meet mine. I push him softly so that he falls onto the bed, allowing me to crawl on top of him. I hear the door open and curse. Louis whistles.
"Hot and steamy!" Lou cackles. I roll my eyes and sit up so that I'm straddling Harry's waist. I look back at Louis and glare daggers at him.
"What do you want, Louis?" I snap.
"Eleanor had the idea to go to a club tonight. It's only midnight and the only thing we have tomorrow is an interview at five. If you can spend a few hours without having sex, do you want to come?"
"I don't think--"
"Sounds great," I interrupt Harry, smirking at him. "Now get your ass out of here so I can get dressed, Louis!"
He rolls his eyes and leaves the room. I plant one more kiss on Harry's lips and go to the dresser to pick out a quick outfit for the club. I end up in a black lace H&M dress that reaches about halfway down my thighs, with converse, since that's what everyone else is wearing. I put on a little mascara as an afterthought and then Harry and I meet everyone else in the living room. Again. Eleanor is wearing her American Apparel navy blue dress, Tyler is wearing a similar style except from Forever 21, and Perrie, of course, is wearing her adorable black lace jones+jones dress with a gold bow belt. I love that outfit. Finally, we all get downstair and pile into the van with everyone else. The club is loud and people are drunk off their asses. I stifle a laugh. This'll be an interesting night.
A/N: Perrie's dress is on the right, if you were wondering.
Tyler and Perrie are grinding on the dance floor, leaving Liam and Zayn's eyes wide and mouths open. I laugh. Louis is sitting next to me, Niall and Harry are sitting across from us, and Clara is in the bathroom for whatever reason. I haven't seen her in a few minutes. I squeeze Louis's hand and he squeezes mine right back. God, I love him so much,
"This was a good idea, Eleanor! We needed this!" Harry shouts over the music.
"I told you so, Harry!" I shout back. He laughs. I look around. Clara still hasn't come back. "Harry, where's Clara? She's been gone for a while."
"I thought she went to the bathroom. Could you go check on her? Would you mind?" Harry requests.
"Of course!" I tell him, standing up and giving Lou a peck on the cheek before making my way to the ladies' room. I open the door. "Clara? Are you in here?" No one answers, but I hear someone crying in a stall. I open it and, sure enough, there's Clara. Sobbing her eyes out on the closed toilet seat, mascara running down her cheeks. "Clara, what happened?"
I make my way to the bathroom after having too many drinks. I hadn't noticed the group of boys standing in the hall until I bump right into them. "Sorry," I mutter, looking up. Holy shit, they look like replicas of Jace's friends. It's not them, they have some different features, but I scares me half to death.
"Watch where you're going, whore," one of them says. It pushes me over the edge. I run into the bathroom before they can see me cry. I let out a sob. I shouldn't have agreed to come here. I'm too broken. I should have known I wasn't ready for this kind of thing anymore. I leave the stall door unlocked and sit on the closed toilet seat, letting tears cascade down my cheeks like a waterfall. My breathing is quick and shallow. Harry can't fix me. I knew that. But I let my guard down anyway. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He's famous. I know he hates being called that, but it's true. He is. It doesn't mean he doesn't have a personality as well, but it does mean that he has other things to worry about. I suddenly feel all too sober. Harry can't actually care. Why would he? I'm a broken fan that he's taken under his wing. It's probably all for publicity anyway. He doesn't actually care about me--why would he? Out of all the perfect and fixed fans in the world who are more than willing to even meet him, he chose me. A broken, depressed, desperate girl who is just a piece of scrap metal in a fucking junkyard. I hear the door open.
"Clara? Are you in here?" I hear Eleanor call. I don't answer, hoping that she'll just go away, that she'll leave me alone. But my crying gives it away and she opens the door. "Clara, what happened?" I just let out another sob.
"Please," I manage to say. "I can't go back out there and face Harry right now. I'll clean myself up and I'll meet you back at the table, just please. Don't tell Harry."
"Fine. If you don't come out in the next five minutes, I will send Harry in here himself," Eleanor warns me. I nod and she pulls me into a tight hug before leaving me to take off my make up and make it look like I wasn't just bawling my eyes out. When I'm ready, I take a deep breath and join everyone outside. The next hour is agonizing. I don't talk, don't even look at Harry, and finally, we get back into the van and head back to the hotel in an uncomforable silence. When we get back to the hotel, the awkward silence continues on the way up to our rooms in the elevator. The floors tick by slowly. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. And finally, here we are. floor 15. The drunken couple stumble to their rooms while Harry and I, all too sober, walk quietly back to our room. I change quickly into my t-shirt and sweatpants as opposed to one of Harry's bigger t-shirts and we lie in silence on opposite sides of the bed until Harry finds the balls to speak first.
"Why are you being so distant all of a sudden, Clara?" Harry asks, rolling onto his side to look at me. "I just want to help you, but you keep pushing me away."
"Harry, this isn't some P!nk song. I'm broken and you can't fix me. No one can." And you probably don't care anyway.
"But, Clara, I love you. You know that. So won't you at least let me try?" Harry sounds so broken-hearted.
"Harry, there's nothing you can do," I whisper, a tear betraying me and burning down my face like lava.
"When you come back to England with us, we'll get you someone to help, okay? You don't have to be alone. There are other people who can help, too," he says. I can tell he doesn't fully believe it himself.
"I don't understand why you haven't just given up already," I whisper, scooting closer to him.
"Because I never will," he promises. "I will never, ever leave you. Not even if you want me to. Because I love you, Clara."
"I love you, too," I whisper, once again letting my guard down. But I know my walls can't stay up forever. They are already crumbling. One more kiss and--of course, he kisses me just then, collapsing all walls at once and rescuing me from my stupid tower like a prince saving his princess. And I feel home. Broken, but at least I have someone to help me pick up the pieces, if not put them back together again.
Hello all my Bittersweet readers!!!! I hope you liked this chapter, and I know you will post comments below...;) Have you all watched the boys' Midnight Memories music video???? They're crazy and beautiful! If not, the link is posted to the right, so you can watch it right now! Love you all and thanks so much for your support!!!!!!
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How would you feel if your whole world was ripped from under you, leaving you free falling? Wouldn't you want someone to catch you? When Clara Higgens's mom dies from an unknown disease, Clara has no where to turn, except to her new and unexpected f...