Beautiful Madness (Aravella Serene) UNDER REVISION

Chapter 4: Goodnight

I know I'm already on the brink when he came into my life. I'm desperate to be freed that my sanity was at stake. The only thing that holding me back to jump on the cliff was my thin thread of faith and love for my family. If there's any left because I'm sure it was drifting slowly. I'm only holding onto a very delicate string. And when he came, it was madness. My fear, my doubts, my faith, my sanity... even myself, I completely lose it all. I lost everything.

Alam kong wala dapat akong ibang sisihin kundi sarili ko pero hindi ko lang talaga mapigilan. He's a walking invitation to what I've been longing for. He's a temptation that no one could ever resist and even without asking me, the day I met him, I knew I would gladly jump off the cliff. Not because I was expecting for him to be down there, ready to catch me but because I'm aware that he's my only way. My only hope to deliverance. My dark hope.

"M-Mau..."

Nakatulog ako ng ilang oras. I woke up with a very dry throat kaya dali-dali kong sinaid ang selyado pang mineral water sa lamesa. When I'm done, I wonder where the people on our table went. Mag-isa na lang ako sa lamesa. Tinanaw ko ang stage kung saan may tumutugtog na banda. Sa harap ay mga nagtatalunan tao. The party is obviously on the peak and everyone gone more wild.

Ilang oras ba akong nakatulog? Siguro'y matagal-tagal din dahil medyo gumaan ang pakiramdam ko.

Nang makitang nasa katawan ko pa rin ang aking chain purse ay naginhawaan ako. I took my phone out and saw Astrid tried to call me for the past hour. Mag a-alas tres na ng umaga at dalawang oras na simula noong tumawag siya kaya siguradong tulog na iyon. Baka magising pa kung tatawagan ko kaya huwag na lang at uuwi na ako ngayon. Tutal ay medyo nahimasmasan naman ako ng kaonti.

Tumayo ako at sinuyod ng tingin ang buong bar para hanapin si Maureen. I need to go home now. She promised me na siya rin ang maghahatid sa akin kaya kailangan ko siyang mahanap. The tables are almost empty and I bet everyone are jamming in front with the performing band. Kaya wala akong choice kundi sumiksik sa mga nagtatalunan at pawisan tao para hanapin si Maureen.

The sound of the electric guitar is very defeaning. Idagdag pa ang vocalist na hindi naman kumakanta kundi sumisigaw lang. Sumasakit tuloy ang tainga at ulo ko.

"Excuse me..."  I covered my ears as I walked passed to the sea of crowds.

Nagtutulakan ang iba kaya nadadamay tuloy ako. Imbes na sa harap ang tungo ko, naaanod tuloy ako kung saan-saan. Everyone is jumping around. Screams and laughters filled my ears. Ngumiwi ako nang pinilit na makatawid patungo sa harap.

"Excuse me." halos sigaw na ang ginagawa ko. Mahilo-hilo ako sa gulo ng mga tao until I felt a hand my shoulder.

"Aravella!"

Isang tumatalon at tumatawang Gemma ang nakita ko. Her hair is in tangled. Her crooked smile is weird and there's something different with her vibes. She's too energetic.

"Saan ka galing? I've been looking for you! Hindi ka tuloy nakasama sa amin kanina! Sayang." pasigaw lahat iyon.

Sa kabila ng ingay at gulo, pinilit ko siyang sagutin.

"Nakatulog ako. I'm sorry. Have you seen Maureen? Uuwi na sana kami at madaling araw na."

"Uuwi? Ang aga pa! Mamaya na! Sumama ka muna sa akin! You'll have fun, I assure you!" sabay hila niya sa aking braso. Wala akong nagawa kundi magpatangay.

Sinuong namin ang dagat ng mga nagtatalunan tao na nakikisigaw sa maingay na pagkanta ng banda sa harap. Geez. Is that even music? That surely is a purely noise.

"Gem, nakita mo ba si Maureen? Uuwi na sana kami pagkatapos nito." I said and it was futile. She didn't heard me. Hindi ko alam kung dahil sa ingay o dahil hindi talaga ako pinakinggan.