"I feel like I got thunder and lightning inside of me. You make me nervous, but you also make me calm. Real calm. Calm almost like how God must be calm...Calm from loving." When Zeek said that in The Get Down it pulled at the chords of my heart. I can't wait 'til I meet a man that makes me calm. Eases my soul. I always thought if a man puts butterflies in your stomach that it's a good thing, but that's nervousness. I want a man I can be myself around and not be nervous about it. Dreams..
I sit in front of my vanity running my flat iron over a section of the curly hair I have in my head. As I'm about to go to the next piece I hear a knock at my apartment door. I furrowed my eyebrows hitting the home button on my phone to see what time it is. I was in the process of getting ready for my date with D'Anthony. It's only 2 o'clock and he's not supposed to be coming until 3pm. Nobody is supposed to be coming over or at least informed me ahead of time.
I get up from my vanity then go over to my door. Before opening it I look in the peephole. I don't even know why I tried because I can never tell who it is. All I had on was a large t-shirt and underwear underneath, so I only opened my door a little. When I saw it was Brayden I said, "What? Why are you just showing up to my place unannounced?" I say as he stands there trying to look in.
"Because you haven't been answering my calls or texts. Let me in, Zi."
"No. I told you what it was last time I saw you. It's over. We're not fucking around anymore. We let it go on for too long. Now can you go, I'm busy."
"I'm not going anywhere until you let me in," he says loudly as his voice echoed down the hallway.
"Would you shut up," I say between clenched teeth.
"No!" He yells loudly. "Let me in," he says looking at me between the small space that I had the door open. "Is someone in there? Is that why you won't let me in?"
"No, Brayden! Even if I did, it wouldn't be your business. I tried to let you down easily..nicely. I said we can still be friends, but you need to let it go."
"I don't want to be your fucking friend, Zipporah. I only settled for the friends with benefits bullshit because I just knew you would change your mind. I guess I was wrong..."
"Yes, you were. I can't and won't ever be in a relationship with you. I told you that!"
"Why? Why, Zipporah? Because I'm white?!" He yells.
"Why the fuck are you yelling?" I ask looking down the hallway to see one of my neighbors looking at us as she locks her door. I look back at Brayden saying, "But yes. Yes, it's because you're white. You know damn well it would never work, so face the facts and move on. Now I have a date to get ready for," I say about to shut the door, but he sticks his foot in. "Move!"
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The God Complex || GoldlinkGeneral Fiction
D'Anthony Carlos has skated through life always being protected. When you're related to the biggest drug cartel in the DMV you gotta be protected. When all of your uncles are the most feared and respected you automatically garner the same attention...