Living Again~ Thirty-Nine

18.8K 309 13

Beeping sounds... hushed whispers.. shuffling feet...metal clinging...

I frowned, or at least I think that's what I was doing. All I could see was black. I felt someone touch my hand, and heard an unfamiliar male voice, "Marissa, open your eyes."

I did, and it only took me a second to realise I was in the hospital. Then I remembered Ethan was injured and I had overdosed. 

I jerked upright and looked around frantically, spotting the person who had just talked to me, an elderly man who must be my doctor was looking at me patiently. 

"Where... where is Ethan? Is he okay?" 

The doctor gave me a stern look, "Marissa, you need to lie down and rest, your body was not used to the drugs and so the overdose can be dangerous for you if you don't take it easy. Now, I'm going to get the nurse to get you some food, now that you're awake we don't have to feed you through a tube so-"

"Wait, how long have I been out?"

"Almost 2 days." 

I frowned, "That's not possible, it's not like I swallowed the whole bottle..."

"Well, your body was not used to the medicine, and the ones you took were rather strong so they had a negative affect on your body. But you're lucky there there was no damage to your organs. Don't worry, you'll be just fine. We re-hydrated you and gave you appropriate nutrition. So just take it slow until you're fully recovered. Your parents are here, i'll send them in right now."

With that he left and a second later Claire and Joe came rushing in.

Claire grasped my hand tightly, "Marissa! What were you thinking? Do you know how worried we were? We thought something might happen to you! Gosh.. just.." She was crying and I couldn't believe how I could have been this reckless. I wanted to punch myself. She smoothed my hair and hugged me, practically crushing my bones in the process. Luckily Joe put his hands on her shoulders and gently pulled her away.

They both looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to explain myself. But I couldn't. I was still shocked at their concern for me. And I felt so, so stupid for ever thinking that I couldn't live without my parents, when I had these two wonderful people caring for me as if I was their own daughter. I couldn't believe how selfish I had been.

"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. It won't happen again, I'm done with all this," I whispered and they nodded solemnly. In that moment all I could do was hope they understood. That I was ready to accept my parent's death and truly move on. Not because of Ethan or anyone else, but because I had, through my own actions, realised where I stood and where I wanted to go. And I couldn't get there without the love of these two people. Even if I could, I wouldn't want to because over the past few months, they have become my family. And I love and appreciate them both so much. I just hope they understand.

The doctor wouldn't let me leave the room to go see Ethan, but everyone had assured me that he was going to be completely fine. He was even going to be discharged in a few days. I was jittery the whole time though, playing with my fingers, anxiously waiting for a chance to sneak out of my room. There was no point, I knew a nurse would find me and I had no idea about which room Ethan was in. My memory from that night was fuzzy so I definitely didn't remember any details about where he would be. A part of me was okay with not seeing him. Because I wouldn't know what to say to him and I didn't know if I could see him in such a broken state.

The time dragged on. I had to stay under inspection for a few more hours and I was going to be discharged in the evening. At one point Brianna came in.

"Oh you're awake," she said, grabbing a chair and dragging it next to my hospital bed. "That was quite a night huh?"

Looking at her pretty little face reminded me of that night. Everything was going wrong and I can't imagine what would have happened to me if she hadn't shown up. Once again I was speechless to how blind I have been, I was so busy feeling sorry for my own loss that I completely lost sight of what was right in front of me. I have never appreciated these people as much as I did now. And maybe I'm glad that this happened to me, because this is what it took to make me realise that there was no reason for me feel hopeless. There was nothing wrong with feeling sad, that's inevitable when you lose someone important. But that doesn't mean there's no hope. Because there's always someone who is not willing to give up on you, even when you have already given up on yourself.

Living AgainRead this story for FREE!