38. Losing control for her

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Weneva i think i have understood him he throws a new bomb at me which completely shakes me. I can't believe like seriously he behaved so irrationally. Weneva he behaves like this i start questioning myself

Can i ever get out of this hell? What if he wishes to torture me foreva? What if he's never sated? How can he overreact on such a petty issue? How can he get so angry over such a small thing? Is he a bipolar?

I mean he was so sweet upstairs in my room when he said he won't let me fall or die. No matter it was in his own twisted way it was then to sweet. God please help me. Thank god he didn't kill that boy.

After i took care of his hand  we went out for the jet ski. The way he looks at me like there is not only lust some strong emotions running inside him makes my whole body electrified. Has he started liking me?Not possible it is only lust. Maybe he is trying to play with me to get into my pants

 Do i like him? Why will i care if he is bleeding or not. Because im a human. Thats it.

Well my current focus. Just seeing the water my legs have started shivering. The closer we get the more my heartbeats raise. No i cant do this. Alex was still holding my hand but i halt my steps. I cant.

He sense my resistance and stops too. He removes his jacket and hand over to the man working there. He palms my cheek and kissed me on my forehead. Why did he started acting romantic?

Immediately i swivel my head around to spot chris and find both of them around talking to the person at the counter. But they were not even looking here. Did he actually kissed my forehead. That was like real sweet and touching

I snap my head in his direction again hearing his voice " baby girl listen. There are safety measures. You'll be strapped properly. And trust me I'm a very good swimmer. Nothing will happen to you. " when he is like this i feel he is actually my boyfriend and is so concerned for me. I still don't say anything.

 If he has to sacrifice his life for me will he do it? No. That's what love is. And neither of us love each other.

" Im scared " i admit 

" okay if you don't want to do it. You don't have to. Wait for me here. I'll come in some time " he kiss me again and i nod in return. I don't want to do this seriously.

After he took some steps i hear a bitchy annoying voice with her annoying words again " alex baby girl is too scared to go in the waters. Ohhhhh. You should be. What if some baby piranha attacks this baby girl " i did not even look her way to give her any importance. Chris was talking to some man and i was just standing alone arms crossed.

" what happened? Too pussy to even accept your fears. The way you cannot do such a small thing you cannot do anything. Not even snatch chris from me. Comon look at me. And see how i will enjoy this sitting behind chris. I will be the one with him." she continues her nonsense coming in front of me but i look sideways.

" remember rose ignore me how much you want. But you cant ignore the fact that i am with chris. I'll never ever let chris come to you. He is mine. And what happened that day because of you I'll make you pay fot it. Just watch me" chris calls natalie and she leaves uttering her bullshit. I think I'm already paying for falling in love with chris. If i never loved chris this would have not started

And this fear is nothing compared to the fear i live daily of thinking that i might lose the life of the ones i love. So i can do this right. I can control my life. I want to control my life. Goddamit this is my life.

I walk towards the way alex went and spot him there wearing the necessaries.

" alex " i call him and he turns surprised and happy seeing me. He question me raising his eyebrows.

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