[SS] it's not you, it's me

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IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME

who fell in love

who was left and been torn into pieces.

"its hard to fall when no ones catching...."

cover:/BANNER thanks sa website na pinagkuhan ko!

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ITS NOT YOU, ITS ME

note: the original title of this os "LIE" (diko alam why i entitled it ng ganyan. hehehe and sorry sa grammar and spelling! im that PRO. hehehe but i love writing and READING!)

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the story goes like this:

I love to read books and love to be alone or being with the person closest to me

but as I enter college everything was kind of a big change of the real me. Even I always linger on my past which is my comfort zone; I manage to make friends with everybody, though most don’t really like me. I used to be with my so called company, have fun and outings with friends and classmates, internet or surfing until dawn and of course like the other teenage girls, fall in love with some cuties. Well it was just infatuation I know though I been hurt too and until then, I'm afraid of loving, I even once said that guys are worst they were just hiding their monster character in their cutie appearance but it wasn't for all men I thought, cause I have many guy-friends whom I trust, those are my big brothers at school…until I met this someone.

He was the person I met before, I don’t really like him when we first met, maybe I was just acting mature and he was really immature that time and we doesn't fit! He became my classmate in a physics class and thinking of my responsibilities, I just found myself counseling him for most of the time until I get to know him more. He became a bridge to me and my classmate and made us became friends again.

We became friends without notice, until the summer begins.

My summer was like the others I had, having fun with other friends, follow-up grades and even meeting my former suitor and I haven't really thought of him even though we seldom communicate through our cell phones by exchanging sms. After summer classes we get to know each other more, we often communicate through sms and he always check me on how's me every day or every other day and often talked about his girlfriend too. For me everything was so natural since I'm not open in any relationship.

The next time that the classes start, it was so unusual that I became excited in meeting him again. We even match our subjects and choose same time so we can be classmates in most of our subjects. We became closer that he even does everything I ask though most are all jokes and test if he would do it for me. Of course he does every favor I ask, he fetches me from home and together we attend our classes. He usually spends his time at home and even does my projects as well. He even met my parents too, present in some occasions and win my sister and brothers heart. In short, he became so welcome to our family. I also used to teach him in some of our subjects, do his assignments and other project as well. We always support each other. We became closer as time goes by, we went out together and I even met his relatives too. But it was all nothing for me, even though we often hold hands and hug together, he was just a brother to me and I know that he still had his girlfriend that time.

We became closer everyday even we got different schedule in the following year. We see each other at school, have meals together and went home together. He never forget me all along, and he always see me before going home, seems like telling me "see you tomorrow". My outings were not like before for he is always on my side. We even sleep together and whenever I hold his hand, it feels like forever. One night, when I need to wait for my teachers he was there with me, but it was too late that he need to go home. I was mad at then knowing that he would be leaving me and because I wasn't’t talking to him, he just kissed me on my cheeks and went home. I was shocked, it was my first time, a guy just kissed me right away and I've never said a word! But I guess it was just nothing since we haven't talked about it anyway.

As usual, I am a busy-college girl; I attend meeting and even conferences. One night, during our conference he called me and ask me to go outside, it was a bad news, he had a break up with his girlfriend and of course I was there lending my ears again and of course after months they were okay again. But after then, time had come that he breaks up with his girlfriend which is another story then. Well our friendship never changed yet and we even became closer. With him I feel so secured and cared which I haven’t experienced in my whole life. He was so different than any other guys I've met before and I'd never imagine that I could met someone like him in my life. Even we have some little fight, I could always found myself smiling, for he don’t want to see me sad, and he want me to wear a smile always. I really enjoy his company and I even found myself changing. He sees the real me and win my trust.

We've been together for years, and I do treasure him most than any other friends of mine. I even up gave many things for him. There's no sweeter than those we had together until we realized that we were breaking boundaries and forgot the limitations. Then he bid "good bye" which put a period of everything we had. Until then we never talked about it, it was just a simple “good bye" and "I mean it" that explains everything.

I thought he could change my perception but he still left me crying. Luckily I never became stubborn and it never causes me to hate men.

That good bye means a lot to me.

I realized that I fall for him, maybe it’s too late.

All I know is that I am true to him except in admitting that love which I always deny.

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(care to comment and vote?! --- I"D LOVED THAT!. THANKS)

DEDICATION:

i dedicate this to AJ-- basta secret nalang... hahaha

PS mahal ko yan! :D

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