Chapter 40: Graduation. (Epilogue)

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One year later.

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"And now, the student body president, Myrna Rockwell, would like to state her final graduation speech from Columbus' high school. Please step up Ms. Rockwell."

The principal, Mr. Andersen flashed me an encouraging smile, urging me to get up from my seat and step up to the huge white podium that was decorated with navy blue and white beautiful graduation decoration.

It was our graduation.

I smiled nervously back at the principal, then clutched the speech's paper between my palms a little bit too harshly.

"You can do this." I mumbled to myself. I inhaled a large breath, biting the edge of my lower lip.

"Yes you can."

I snapped my head to my right, looking up to see Elliot's gorgeous warm smile, and bright blue encouraging eyes, gazing down in so much love at me. Even now, after about a year of us dating, two years of me being so helplessly in love with him, he even seemed to make me feel the same exact feelings, with even more power. The look he gave me, made my stomach flutter, but only it calmed me down. It was like he had put so much faith in me with that look, that I refused to let him down unconsciously and instantly. I smiled back, even gave him my huge grin.

I nodded my head eagerly for him, standing up and taking a deep breath as I did so. It was finally our graduation, and honestly I was so excited to begin a yet new life in college. Finishing the many years of school torture never sounded more appealing than right now, and we were all too eager for it.

  "Go go Mimi!" Austin shouted clapping and cheering up for me from down his seat. I smiled at him, and walked out to were the principle previously stood, trying not to trip with my graduation gown and make a total fool out of myself.

I stood staring at the sea of people. Parents and friends scattered all around. They were all watching me with small smiles plastered on their faces waiting for the speech I was yet going to give.

Okay let's do this.

Taking a deep breath, I glanced at Elliot one last time before starting.

"Struggle. This simple word might have different meanings to each and everyone of us. It's just how we see it, and what flashes in our minds when we hear this word. It's either our own definition of it, or that it just means something from an experience we previously had." I spoke to the microphone, taking in now more confidence that I had started my speech.

"But for me, now that I mention this word, it just amazes me how life can change in a such a short period of time. An event can happen in your life and you could just, flip to a whole new different person, to a whole new different world. The way you deal with the changes, the way you'd choose whether to struggle or not, that's what makes you who you are."

I glanced at my family, now the family that cherished me and made me who I was standing up as right now, and smiled from the deepest bottom of my heart.

"The fact that you're struggling doesn't make you a burden. It doesn't make you unloveable or undesirable or undeserving of care, as you'd think. It doesn't make you too much or too sensitive or too needy. It makes you human." I closed my eyes, the words not just coming out of my mouth, but out of my heart.

"Everyone struggles. Everyone has a difficult time coping, and at times, we all fall apart. During these times, we aren't always easy to be around and that's okay. No one is easy to be around one hundred percent of the time."

"Yes, you may sometimes be unpleasant or difficult. And yes, you may sometimes do or say things that make the people around you feel helpless or sad, or things that makes them leave. But those things aren't all of who you are and they certainly don't discount your worth as a human being. The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved. You can be difficult and still be cared for. You can be less than perfect, and still be deserving of compassion and kindness."

Tears were now stinging my eyes, as I came to reach the halt of my speech. But my smile never faded, as I confidently raised up my voice.

"Even if everything was taken away from us, we can choose the right path. We can still live, we can struggle and we can reach our goal. We can shout out loud when it all turns out to be okay that we have made it."

"And right now, we have made it."

We have made it.  

Loud applause echoed out from everyone watching me and they all stood up. Each and everyone of them. My eyes though, trained on those whom seemed to be what my whole life circulated about at that time, those whom I see in my heart and mind, are worth my struggle.

My cousins, my aunt, my friends and Elliot. They stood up sitting in the front row of the non-graduates except Elliot and Alex who stood close behind me to the podium where I was. They all had this warm full of pride smile nodding their heads and just, making me feel so precious.

"Your mother would be so proud babygirl!"

"I'm so proud of you pumpkin!"

"Myrna the speech was even better than the pizza we ate one hour ago!"

"My baby sister.."

"You made it grumpy."

"I'm in love with you cupcake."

And as so, Elliot turned me around and pressed his lips on mind instantly but only for a brief kiss.

And I just couldn't help but smile wider, feel nothing but perfection in this moment.

"Throw your graduation caps!" Somebody yelled through the noisy crowd.

And we did, we threw them up in such a beautiful gesture and laughed our hearts out.

For the first time in forever, for the first time since the whole dramas and actions that has been happening, I felt that it all wasn't just being okay at the moment, but that it all will be okay. I felt that I was now, surrounded by people who fulfilled the presence of a family I lost, of hospitality that was burned and killed, and of that love which was taken away from me.

And not just me, and not just love.

I found what I could be, what I wanted to be. I found the love of a family and a soulmate that I wouldn't trade for the whole world. We thought it all had been taken,

Away from us,

But I was totally wrong. It was the exact same opposite.

-FIN-

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