𝐒𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐑 ❱ 𝐃𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐈 𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔

fifteen.

the eerie darkness of that night would never escape dazai's memory. he vividly remembered the pitch-black curtain draped over the sky and the twisted, warped shapes that the stars made against the blackness.

the milky speckles twirled and danced along the sky in various patterns, tugging at the corners of his lips in a way that almost made him smile. it was hard to shove aside the worries corrupting his mind, but eventually, he stopped walking in front of the bar and stopped thinking.

he was alone, nothing from his life could touch him. not a single thing could harm him. he stared up at the sky, with hand shoved in his pocket, and studied the silver glow of the moon.

the moon smiled down at him with love so intense it warmed his soul like a fireplace on a cold winter's night. and there he was, inside of the bar at midnight to escape his life at home, not wanting to do anything but cry.

but the look that the moon gave him didn't cause the storm to go on inside of him. instead, a hot blue fire flickered in his heart and soon started to grow, eating at all of the dark emotions in its path. his worries burned away, and the tears that were starting to form at the corners of his eyes melted down his cold face with a rush of relief.

crying felt good, especially when they were tears that he didn't want to push away. they weren't drops of sadness, no. they were more like the feelings of joy, relief, happiness and freedom streaming away from his hurt eyes.

they were temporary cleaners to wash away the pain. he hardly ever cried. usually it was due to the sudden overwhelming emotions he doesn't usually feel.

but that night, under the protection of millions of stars and the beautiful moon, he felt like he could let the floodgates open with a single snap of his fingers. he stared up at the sky and continued to let his pain run away for the moment.

the cold midnight winds blew harshly and tickled his skin as he sat down in the bar, not ever wanting to leave.

dazai eyed the amber liquid and the golden glow of the glass-like cubes. he poked them with fingers to hear them jingle in the pre-dawn silence. he watched entranced as they bounce back up, remaining mostly submerged like mini icebergs.

wrapping his long fingers around the glass, he felt his heat leach into the drink. alcohol, the elixir of his life.

he raised the glass to sip, feeling the keen burn on his tongue and throat; a burn that made him recoil due to the absent tendency of drinking it. yet now it was a feeling he longed for right from the end of his night.

during dazai's alone time, you were asleep in bed, alone.

"it's cold..." you slurred out as you rolled around and slowly opened your eyes to see dazai gone.

you stared at the spot dazai would, the spot where he would squeeze the living life out of you. in that tight cuddle, although it sometimes hurt, you felt warmth and safety.

the disappearance of dazai almost made you scared and caused you to freak out, but you trusted him.

you trusted him because simply, you loved him and you knew he wouldn't do anything stupid.

the language of love is not spoken but lived. you gently lead dazai to keep him in check. however if he showed you err then the roles are reversed.

he didn't have to be perfect and neither did you, you guys learned together, catch each other, hold more ideals than we can live up to, yet keep walking even though all say the dream is only a dream.

dream's can come true, just dream the right one in the language of love and know what it means; strong hearts, brave souls, complete and healed minds.

you stood up and stretched out your arms with a tired groan and grabbed a jacket and a small blanket.

"i'll just wait for him..." you said with a small yawn as you walked outside and sat down by the door.

you held your knees to your chest, ignoring the empty feeling churning in your stomach, and placed your head on top of them.

in the meanwhile, dazai was still in the bar contemplating whether to leave or stay. it was the same bar that him and his two friends would go to in the past.

it held memories, both good and bad. being the negative person dazai is, he often only remembered the bad.

"wanna have some fun~" some girl snapped dazai from his thoughts as he turned around to eye the girl.

she looked like a female character who would prey on men in order to destroy them for their own purposes or enjoyment. she would flirt and sexually engage the man in order to achieve his devotion, emotional or physical, and then destroy him when either she loses interest in him.

dazai knew what her motive was, judging by how little clothing she had on.

"i can make you feel good~" the girl had purred as she sat on his lap and dazai held the urge to snap at her.

the girl then brought her body closer to his and he swung around with a jerk. there was a momentary flare of anger in his face. that momentary rage turned into permanent rage the more she leaned into him, adding more pressure.

the dazai in the past would simply let them do whatever they wanted, he didn't care about love. but the dazai now felt disgusted.

out of anger, dazai punched the girl as hard as he could, making her fly across the room and everyone in the bar stared in shock.

"fucking disgusting." he spat out and the girl cried out in pain, but he didn't feel bad whatsoever. instead he felt guilty.

he quickly left the bar and eyed his fist that had purple welts scattered across as he sighed. 'i'm not supposed to be here.' he thought as he looked around only to see pitch black. in a swift moment, he began to walk faster until he arrived at the apartment.

when he reached the apartment, he saw your figure at the door and breathed out in relief. he kneeled down to you a patted your hair. with the sudden contact, you woke up surprised and looked up to see dazai smiling at you.

you stood up and wrapped your arms around him and nuzzled into his chest. 'a woman's scent...' you thought as you inhaled his scent but you looked at his bruised knuckle and held it. you smiled to yourself knowing he wouldn't dare cheat on you and hugged him even tighter than before.

the wind was chill and the stars burned with the brilliant sapphire pallor of electric light. you looked at the stars, which were like a beautiful, surreal blanket above your guys heads and could feel his heartbeat against your chest, and could hear the soft breaths of him by your side.

dazai sighed as he laid his head on top of your shoulder. he stayed there for what seemed like an eternity before muttering out two words that made your heart beat fast and stretched a smile across your face.

"i'm home."