The 99 Problems of Being Sam.

Problem Seven: Testing.

There’s nothing specific about this problem. It’s just crippling anxiety and the boredom that comes after finishing, assuming you’re early. I’ve taken to just taking out my journal and writing down observations about the rest of the class. Now it’s just something I do on a regular basis, with no real reason other than force of habit. Here, I’ll just include some of the things I wrote after finishing a decently challenging test in math, which I later found out I was the only one who got perfect marks on it.
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-I’m the only one finished with the test and we still have, like, forty minutes left on it. Somebody save me!
-John seems to be struggling. I really hope that he does well, I know how much pressure his parents are putting on him for this… He’s been stressing out almost as much as me. Oh, he looked over at me. Helloooooo Joooohhhhnnnn. Totally not writing about you while I smile and wave. He looked back down. Poor guy. Best of luck to him.
-Jack has been spotted cheating. I want to tell the teacher but I’m still the only one done. I’ll just tell him afterwards. Oh crud Jack’s looking over at me. Middle finger activated! Nope. I can’t flip people off, I don’t cuss. I’m smiling at him instead. Not the innocent smile I gave John though. It’s the ‘I caught you doing the thing you weren’t supposed to and now you’re totally screwed’ smile. HAHA >:D
-Ashley has finished and is now…? I don’t even know. She’s tracing thing’s in the air in front of her and glancing back at me. Like, what even Ash?
-Been five minutes. Figured out what Ashley was doing. She was writing letters. She’s still doing it. Writing them down now.
S-t-o-p-s-t-a-r-i-n-g-a-t-m-e-i-t-s-c-r-e-e-p-y
-Oh. Well then, she coulda just glared at me really harshly or something. Besides, Ash, it should be apostrophe s, because ‘its’ is possessive, while ‘it’s’ is the conjunction for ‘it is’. BAM grammar!
-Okay so nobody is really doing much but coughing and working, so now what? I recently had this idea for a story. Wanna hear it? Who am I asking…? Well whatever. So basically there’s this girl who has a wooden heart charm thingy, and then she loses it. Eventually a boy finds it and keeps it safe, not knowing who it belongs to. The story flips between their perspectives, but one day the boy’s adopted sister, who was in love with him, burned the heart out of jealousy. Turns out the heart was the girl’s lifeline, and she died, but not before the boy got to know her and grow attached to her. HAPPY FUN TIMES!
-JOHN JOHN JOHN JOHN NOTICE ME SENPAI. JOHN. Hey he finally looked over! I’d been staring at him intently and he finally happened to glance up. He got scared or something I guess because his expression was priceless. I’m struggling not to laugh now x3
-The teacher saw me giggling. Darn. He yelled at me and now I’m upset. :( very much not cool Mr. James. Very much not cool.
-OMG Can we just be done? Like for real it isn’t my fault that these people are ignoramooses! LET US GO ON! WE MUST BE FREEEEEEEE! FREE LIKE THE TIGER! But not the ones in the zoo…..those aren’t free….
-Silvester is weird. He finished second, and now he’s glowering at everyone. He’s such a gwupmy gusssss *said in baby voice* Just felt you should know that I didn’t misspell grumpy. Well now it’s ruined. The flow of this is broken. JusT LiKe REalItY! HAHAHAHaHahAhAhAHAHAhahaHA! I r normal promise.
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I’m just gonna stop there. Reading notes and such that people wrote for themselves can reveal a lot about them, and we still have the rest of the book to go. Besides, that last one was the sanest of the rest. I’m looking through them now, and a few are just…no words can be used to describe the lack of sanity in them. Moving on from this problem!