Scars

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"She says nothing at all, but simply stares upward into the dark sky and watches, with sad eyes, the slow dance of the infinite stars."
-Neil Gaiman

Ryder had never been partial to Halloween. As a child she hadn't ever been trick or treating. Her mother would throw some candy at her and tell her to go to her room for the rest of the night. The other kids at school always came in costumes that day. There were princesses, cowboys, astronauts, all types on animals. When Ryder had asked her mother for a costume, Caroline had simply laughed at her.

When she grew older, Halloween became less about candy and more about parties. Ryder had very bad memories of parties and she stayed far away from the grinding and alcohol. She knew what that would lead to and she knew that was not what she wanted.

But sometimes you don't get what you want.

"How do I look?" Leah stood in front of Ryder smoothing the satin robe that fell around her. She was dressed as a boxer, with a sports bra, shorts and a robe emblazoned with gloves. It showed off her toned stomach and long legs.

"Freezing." Ryder muttered drily. They stood outside of her car, looking out at the party on the beach. Teenagers were strewn all over the sand, congregated near coolers of alcohol and a roaring beach wood fire. Ryder was surprised at the amount of skin on display. She understood Halloween was a time to dress as slutty as possible, but it was 30 degrees out!

"Whatever, I know I look good." Leah rolled her eyes. "And as soon as I get some alcohol in me, I'll be warm as can be."

"Suit yourself." Ryder burrowed back into the oversized sweater. She wore all black, intent on hiding in the shadows. Leah had forced her into a tight top that bared some of her midriff and mandated she wore a halfassed cat headband as a costume. Ryde had struck back by throwing one of Harry's sweaters on and her favorite pair of sweatpants. She wasn't going to freezing her ass off tonight.

"Look, im sorry I forced you into this." Leah whispered. "I know what happened last time you went to a-"

"I'm fine, Leah." Ryder cut her off with a tight voice. "Just go have fun. Find me if you need a ride. You deserve to let loose." Leah scanned her face worriedly until her pregamed beers began to kick in. She left Ryder's side with a hasty goodbye, running down towards the fire and immediately getting enveloped in writhing teens.

Ryder made her way down to the beach gingerly. The wind was cold and the waves blew a spray of icy cold water over the party. The others didn't seem to mind. Everywhere she looked, it seemed as if people were grinding without fail. She didn't see the appeal of being packed together like sardines, but apparently everyone else did.

Ryder wrapped her sweater tighter around herself, walking aimlessly down the beach. The music from the party began to fade away as she strayed further and she was left only with the comforting sounds of water crashing against the sand.

She remembered a phrase from one of her favorite poems in that moment. "She smiled at the ocean because the waves knew her story." Ryder whispered softly, her quote of RM Drake carried off into the wind. She stood there, her back pressed against a jutting rock, watching the ocean with mesmerized eyes. It was ever-changing, always moving and Ryder loved it.

Laughs erupted from down the beach, startling her. A group of four guys was staggering past, beer bottles in hand and she shrunk back into the cliff to avoid detection. It worked. They stumbled by, laughing over trivial things like girls costumes and keg stands. Ryder wrinkled her nose.

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