CHAPTER 18 - "The chance to say goodbye"

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Everybody came out from the Tower running. People were moving so fast, I was trying to think, to focus. Why am I doing this? Who am I protecting? So I threw myself toward Bellamy. Aspen was trying to stop some rebellious soldiers from hurting Lexa or Octavia while Kort was gathering his archers. I knew Aspen was doing this for Lexa, to own her forgiveness but I couldn't stop thinking that he really wanted to protect us after all. Lexa was keeping Octavia in distance. She was devastated I could tell by the look in her eyes.

Bellamy looked at me. He was scared. We both turned our faces toward the army of people running in front of us. He took my hand without taking his eyes off the soldiers.

One of them came closer to Bellamy and punched him in the face several times. He was bleeding. Another got his sword out and yelled: "The dead will be avenged!" He pointed his sword on Bellamy's chest still running and stabbed. Lexa screamed. I turned slowly and saw Bellamy's face, he didn't seem to be in pain except for the blood on his forehead but his face was decomposing. I got stabbed.

I didn't even realized what I had done. I put myself between this soldier and Bellamy in the blink of an eye. I felt a horrible pain coming from my stomach; the soldier just removed his blade from my body. This time the contrast was overwhelming. The cold blood flowing out while my whole body was burning of pain and sadness. I fell on the ground; Bellamy couldn't catch me this time. My head made a violent sound hurting the dust of the square_ Echoic.

Lexa and Octavia ran toward me. Bellamy fell next to me and took my head on his knees while Lexa was holding my hand. I was slowly couching when I saw Octavia crouched in front of me.

"Clarke ... " She said shaking.

"It's okay ... I'm glad we had the chance to say goodbye." I said softly. Octavia bowed her head crying.

"Don't say that ... you're not going to die." She said, but I didn't answer. I couldn't. I was slowly losing my strength.

The crowd stopped the minute I got stabbed. But seeing their queen dying woke up some of them. The soldier who stabbed me was threatened by the others, so I decided to use my last strength to talk to them. I pressed Lexa's hand to ask for their silence.

"Remember..." I started. "You're stronger than that, we kill the man who brought the gun not the one who holds it." I tried to catch my breath but it was really hard. The blood couldn't stop flowing and it was hurting me. Bellamy passed his arms around me. I looked at him so deeply that I could see my own reflect into his eyes, like the first time we kissed. I smiled. "I'm glad we made this short ride together, I'm proud to be your queen and I hope you'll remember these words."

I didn't stop looking at Bellamy like I wanted to keep the picture of his face forever in my mind and then I said: "I'm not scared."

He let a tear fell on my face. "I am." He whispered.

I saw people moving in front of me and Kort came out followed by the archers. "Stop this tearful ceremony, you're not dying today." He said firmly and ordered to carry me inside. Kort never really showed his feelings but I knew he was scared. That was why he was moving everywhere yelling orders.

They put me on the table in the throne room. I saw Titus running toward me. He wasn't attending to the duels because that was how he lost his brother, so he just discovered what happened. He took some wine and bandages while he was sending some archers to take his medical stuff. He came closer and lifted my jacket to see the wound.

"I need space. Everybody out." He said. They all obeyed even if I didn't want them to leave. The door closed and Titus removed the blood on my skin with some alcohol. I screamed. "Hold on Clarke. I'm going to get you out of here." He was shaking a little. I'd never see him so stressed so I took his hand and made him come closer so he could hear me.

"Bellamy." I said in a breath. "Can he..." I hadn't finish my sentence that Titus was already at the door asking for Bellamy to come in. He ran to me and grabbed my hand. I smiled and let a tear flowed from my eye. He lifted my hand and put it against his chest. He was still bleeding but he didn't seem to care. Titus gave me some wine and took a needle.

"How bad is it?" Bellamy asked worried.

"The cut is deep. I'll do my best." He said focused on the preparation.

I couldn't really hide my fear or my pain anymore. I knew why I asked for Bellamy more than anyone else, because he was the only one who knew how to soothe me. I slowly closed my eyes and remembered the first time I believed in him. It was just after Octavia found out about the massacre when he blamed himself so hard for everything that happened. I trusted him now, more than that, I needed him. That was it I was in love with him.

Like he knew what I was thinking Bellamy came closer to me and put a soft kiss on my forehead. When he drew back he was smiling and whispered:

"Everything is just about your behavior with needles."

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