HIPPOPOTAMUS (BXB)

Act Six

"I'd say good luck, but you won't need it," he cheered. I gave him a wink and went onto the stage.

"Theodore Green, auditioning for the part of Romeo Montague," I announced on the stage.

"Very well," our director said from her seat in the crowd. Those who had already auditioned were seated randomly behind her. "Begin." I took a deep breath in and then let it out.

"Ha, banishment! Be merciful, say death; for exile hath more terror in his look, much more than death. Do not say banishment!" I cried in disgust.

"Hence from Verona art thou banished. Be patient, for the world is broad and wide," our director read back.

"There is no world without Verona walls, but purgatory, torture, hell itself. Hence-banished is banished from the world, and world's exile is death. Then banished, is death miss-termed; calling death banishment, thou cutt'st my head off with a golden axe, and smilest upon the stroke that murders me.

"O deadly sin. O rude un-thankfulness. Thy fault our law calls death; but the kind prince, taking thy part, hath rushed aside the law, and turned that black word death to banishment. This is dear mercy, and thou seest it not." It was time for me to bring out the big guns.

"'Tis torture, and not mercy!" I wailed. "Heaven is here, where Juliet lives; and every cat and dog and little mouse – every unworthy thing – live here in heaven and may look on her; but Romeo may not. More validity, more honourable state, more courtship lives in carrion-flies than Romeo; they seize on the white wonder of dead Juliet's hand and steal immortal blessing from her lips – who even in pure and vestal modesty – still blush, as thinking their own kisses sin.

"But Romeo may not; he is banished. Flies may do this, but I from this must fly. They are free men, but I am banished. And say'st thou yet that exile is not death? Hadst thou no poison mixed, no sharp-ground knife, no sudden mean of death, though never so mean, but banished to kill me? Banished? O friar, the damned use that word in hell – Howlings attend it – how hast thou the heart, being a divine, a ghostly confessor, a sin-absolver, and my friend professed, to mangle me with that word banished?" I clutched at my heart over my chest, as if verbally speared with the word banished. Ronan and Matilda erupted into cheers and clapped me from the stage. I walked down the steps and into the crowd to join them.

"That was epic," Ronan declared when I reached them and sat down too.

"No one did it better," Matilda beamed at me in the dimness of the audience. I was feeling pretty confident, but it wasn't over until the fat lady sung. Jeremy went on last but not least, and he did a pretty good job considering his nerves. We were all dismissed for lunch while our director went and made her decisions. We left the theatre and headed up the main street towards the Honey Oak Cafe.

"What time are you meeting the Divine God?" Matilda asked me as we walked along. I pulled out my phone to check the time, it'd just gone 1pm.

"Two," I told her.

"I really hope you guys get the parts you want," Ronan said earnestly. I turned and gave him a massive hug in the middle of the footpath.

"I love you, man," I fake sobbed. He told me to get off him and pushed me away.

We reached the cafe and went inside. Gale worked the morning shift and knocked off at midday, so we didn't see him. We ordered food and then ate, trying to make the half hour we had for lunch go by as painless as possible. I messaged Gale and let him know what was going on, and he wished me luck for the millionth time.

Finally, it was time to head back to the theatre. We made our way there, and everyone piled into the seats while waiting for our director to take the stage and make her announcement. Matilda sat between Ronan and I, and she grabbed one of our hands each and squeezed. Our director walked to centre stage, the spotlight on her as she read off her page.