Dawn pulled away quickly as she realized what exactly she was doing and moved over to her chair, wiping her lips, almost as if she was trying to wipe away the sin of kissing another man. She watched as Richard turned to her, his eyes curious, filled with passion, desire and love.
Here I stand alone
With this weight upon my heart
And it will not go away
In my head I keep on looking back
Right back to the start
Wondering what it was that made you change
"I think you should leave," Dawn whispered getting up to go to her vanity. She picked up a tube of lipstick, more interested in adverting her eyes away from Richard, then the glossy color that she held in her hands.
"Why, so you can deny your feelings some more?" he shot back. "We need to talk about this and whether you want to or not, it’s not the issue anymore. Dawn, we're great together, you know we are! Hell, every piece of fanmessages I have received since the show has started has said one thing!"
"And what's that? That you're an impossible human being?"
"Sorry darling I asked about my messages, not yours! Every letter I have received has said one thing. And that one thing is 'You and Dawn have some amazing chemistry. It's almost as if you knew each other before and dated...Dawn, we belong together, everyone sees it but you!!"
"But we're not together okay? I'm engaged for Christ's sake. Now please leave."
Well I tried
But I had to draw the line
And still this question keeps on spinning in my mind
What if I had never let you go
Would you be the man I used to know
If I'd stayed
If you'd tried
If we could only turn back time
But I guess we'll never know
"No way. Not until you admit that you feel something."
"Fine," she screamed, slamming her dressing room door shut. "I go to sleep at night and everything about you floods my mind. I sleep and dream I am kissing you, I dream of our wedding, I even dream back to high school and we are a couple. And then I wake up and it's nothing more than a dream because I have someone else in that bed! Someone who I love, but because you had to barge back into my life, I am so confused that I feel like I am living in a damn soap opera! I star on one Richard, I don't need my life to be one!"
"And this is easy for me?" he yelled back. To know at one point I could have had you and now when I want you, I can't!"
"And that's my fault? I pined away for you for years. I wasted my Highschool years hung up on a guy who never liked me as more than a friend! And the night you left for college, I stood in our frontdoor and cried! I couldn't walk away because once I tried I almost fell down. Do you even remember that night? I couldn't even say goodbye I was crying so hard. And I don't even think you gave a damn!"
Many roads to take
Some to joy
Some to heart-ache
Anyone can lose their way
And if I said that we could turn it back
Right back to the start
Would you take the chance and make the change
"Do you honestly think I didn't give a damn? Dawn, I came over at the wee hours of morning. I may have seemed too carefree in high school. I acted like I didn't need anyone as long as I had myself. But the truth is, for those years not only were you a prisoner of my love but I was a prisoner of your love," he said slowly, sitting down.
Do you think how it would have been sometimes
Do you pray that I'd never left your side
"Excuse me?"Dawn asked shocked, digesting what he had just told her. "If you were a 'prioress' as you call it, why the hell did you never tell me? You knew I loved you, I flaunted after you for God knows how long, so tell me Richard, why keep it a secret?"
What if I had never let you go
Would you be the man I used to know
If I'd stayed
If you'd tried
If we could only turn back time
But I guess we'll never know
If only we could turn the hands of time
If I could take you back would you still be mine
"Because I was scared... Dawn, I was captain of our team,Campus Personality, I couldn't just date a girl younger than me, you know that!"
"Do you know that comment actually makes me hate you?" she seethed through her teeth. "So you're saying your popularity was more important to you than love?"
"It wasn't so easy for me, you know," he said defending himself. "I would dream of you as well. And when I would see you, I would try to walk away but I was too caught up in you to do it. There are times I would trip because I was so involved at staring at you instead of walking where I was going!"
'Cos I tried
But I had to draw the line
And still this question keep on spinning in my mind
"And I'm supposed to want you now? I don't think so!"
"Damn it, I'm saying this one last time and if you don't want to acknowledge it then fine but I love you. I love you now, I loved you then and even if I was a selfish bastard back then, I have changed. But I can't deny it anymore, I love you and if I have to, I'll scream it so everyone can hear!"
What if I had never let you go
Would you be the man I used to know
What if I had never walked away
'Cos I still love you more than I can say
If I'd stayed
If you'd tried
If we could only turn back time
But I guess we'll never know
We'll never know
"What I want doesn't matter anymore," she whispered. "High school is over. I'm engaged and Martin has always been there for me. And just because you want me now doesn't mean you can have me. Now I need to head home, please leave."
"Fine,"he muttered. He walked out of the room as Dawn broke down in tears knowing he was right... she was denying what she truly wanted... and that was him.
If we could only turn back time
But I guess we'll never know
We'll never know
