''Well Ms. Allen you are indeed pregnant.''
The doctor said coming into the room. Once I heard those words my heart sunk way deep down and so many emotions cane over me. A part of me knew while the other part of me wanted to be in denial how could I be so careless? This was bound to happen every time I asked Drew to wear a condom he'd say for what? Or we don't need one and soon I stopped even asking.I just went with it like everything was fine now look where that got me pregnant with Drew's baby for the second time around.
A baby was the last thing I wanted right now. Truth be told I don't even won't any more kids I'm fine with Brooklyn while Drew wants so many more. I don't know if I'll be able to give him that though.
I couldn't do any thing, but shake my head as my eyes started to water. What am I gonna do? Anybody can see that me and Drew are not ready for another baby and between the arguments, lies, and lack of trust it's just impossible. Not to mention to were not even in a committed relationship shit we not even in a relationship at all. This is just a lot to take in right now, but I feel as if I know what I want to do in this situation.
''How far a long am I?'' I asked dreading the question already.
''Just about 5 weeks.'' He said.
''Damn.'' I mumbled to myself. Hearing this just made it even more surreal I can't have another baby.
''You don't seem too excited Ms . Allen.'' The doctor said looking at me.
''Ohh — uhh — It's not that I'm not excited I'm just in disbelief I didn't plan on having any more kids anytime soon.'' I said.
''So , you already have kids?'' He asked looking kid of surprised.
''Just one she's five years old.'' I said thinking of how hard it was being a teen mom. I had Brooklyn at the age of 17 and yeah my parents were there for me every step of the way, but I still struggled sometimes. I was confused on whether or not I should keep the baby, but Drew convinced me to have it and he'll be there for the both of us.
Things were hard I had to give up a lot to focus on Brooklyn. I don't regret it though because Brooklyn made me the young woman I am today shes taught me a lot and gave me the strength to keep going on. I graduated high school early and went to community college while maintaining two jobs matter of fact. At that time Drew was selling drugs so of course he made sure we were good, but me I still made shit happen on my own especially since I didn't approve of Drew's lifestyle at all.
When Drew went to jail Brooklyn was only 2 years old and I was still living with my parents, but I still needed him. Brooklyn needed him, but he wasn't around. He was facing time over something that could've been avoided and for something I told him to stop doing. I wanted Drew to be a good person for us, but he just couldn't he was too busy running the streets and fucking hoes. Yes Drew always made sure we were good, but money wasn't the answer to everything what about quality time? That's one of the reasons our relationship failed.