62. Mixed Emotions

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It had been a long week, made only slightly easier by my nightly calls with Cam.

Jay was still calling and texting constantly.  Each voice mail went unheard, each text unread.

It was Saturday afternoon and I decided to do what all girls do in my situation.

"If you want something completely different, then I'd suggest the red. With your skin tone and green eyes you'd get away with it, no problem at all."

"Okay." I felt a small bubble of excitement building.

"Now, about the style. I have no doubt at all that it would suit you, but I'm reluctant to get rid of the length in one sitting."

I appreciated her comments and thought about how much Jay loved my hair.

"Do it. Please." I said quietly.

I watched in the mirror as long turned to short and blonde to red.  I looked up to see the hairdresser eying me cautiously and gave her a bright smile.

"Thank you so much Hannah, I absolutely love it."

She returned my smile as she brushed away the loose hair from my shoulders.

"You're welcome.  And for what it's worth" she added "you look 10 times happier than when you walked in."

I blushed and thanked her.

Next stop: eyebrows, legs, underarms and Brazilian wax.  Yes, it was more torture than enjoyment, but it felt good to treat myself.

At the last minute I decided on an eyelash tint and scolded myself for it when Megan walked in.  I had my back to her but there was no mistaking her voice.

It crossed my mind that she wouldn't recognise me and I could sneak out, but in all honestly I missed her.

"Megan?"  I said tentatively as I turned to face her.

"Mia?"  Tears filled my eyes as I smiled up at her.  "Do you have time for a coffee?" She asked hopefully.

I shook my head and her face fell.  "I have time for wine."  I added, relieved to see her smile return.

"Karen, I'm sorry I'll need to rebook." 

Sensing the slight awkwardness between us, Karen smiled and nodded. 

"Not a problem, call when you're ready."

We sat out in the beer garden, both silent as we waited for our glasses of liquid courage to be brought over.

"You look amazing Mia."  Megan was the first to speak.  "Wait til Jay sees you, he'll..."  Her hand flew up to her mouth when she saw the look of pain on my face.  "Oh god Mia, I'm so sorry."

I blinked away the tears that threatened to fall and gave her a small smile, not trusting myself to speak.

"How is he?"  I asked quietly, hating myself for caring.

"He's not good Mia."  She answered carefully.

I didn't know how to feel, I was so confused about everything.  Megan took my silence as her cue to continue.

"He misses you Mia. He's beside himself worrying about you."

"I still can't believe he did it Megan. Even though he told me himself, I'm finding it hard to believe."

Strangely, Megan's eyes brightened a little and she reached her hand out to mine.

"You should talk to him Mia, let him explain. It's more complicated than you think."

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