It is already past midnight, the clouds thinning, the moon shining brightly, the air getting colder; you should be tucked under the covers now, already fast asleep and yet you find yourself still sitting on a swing, in the middle of the playground you played at when you were little, the swings creaking every time you push the ground to get higher, and beside the most unlikely person you should be with...the man you vowed to love forever. You sigh and stop from swinging. The air grows colder every second, and you berate yourself why you didn't have anything to cover yourself with.
You close your eyes at the sound of his voice, calling out your name. How many times have you imagined this moment in your head? You have waited for this all your life, right after you left, you even dream about it every night, him, right there, beside you, calling out your name. And yet now, now that you finally have the moment, it doesn't feel right, not at all, and instead of your heart soaring, your heart breaks at the sound of it.
"I never really stopped loving you you know."
Suddenly you open your eyes at this random confession. Slowly you turn towards him, you almost close your eyes again at the look on his face, one you never expected. Not now anyway. There it is, that look, the love you have waited to see for months, only for you, only for you. But why does it feels so wrong?
"Really?" You hear yourself utter, your voice almost raspy from not speaking for a long time. You clear your throat and turn away from him, embarrassed. He chuckles despite himself, you look at him and give him a small smile. He sighs, taking this as a good sign and breathes out his reply.
"Yes." It almost sounded like a whisper, but you hear it clearly.
You look back at him again and shake your head, willing yourself scoff and then chuckle, "It's hard to believe that now Andy." You say sighing.
His smile falters at the name you just called him, ofcourse you expected this before you said it, but you just had to, he was always used to being called another, that name you've called him for years, one you want to say outloud right then and there, but refused yourself the right to. Because really, you don't have the right to, not now, not anymore.
He sighs after a moment and looks at you intently, "It's weird hearing that from you." he says, looking sad and depressed and alone all of a sudden. It breaks you looking at him like this, isn't it your life's plan to only bring a smile on that beautiful face? But you fight the feeling and force another small smile for him...you know it breaks him more than it makes him happy. But this is all what the moment has called for.
"What?" You say innocently, your reply altogether different from what he just said. You could've said, 'Why?' or 'It is, isn't it?', but your mind isn't working properly, and this is all that came to you, and so you said it, without thinking, because really, you can't even process anything right now. Even these thoughts doesn't process in your brain, you try to reason but you can't. What's happening to you?
He breathes out, not noticing the emotions playing on your face, it must be because of the darkness, he sighs and look infront of him instead of you, like your face scares him and pains him, "My name." he says his voice full of hurt, and this registers in your puddled brain and you turn away from him, not wanting him to see that a single tear dropped on the right side of your face, the side that's hidden from him. You try not to sniff, but you can't, so instead you kick off from the ground again, the swing creaking from rust again.
"What's weird about being called Andy? That's your name anyway." You finally say after you get your first high up, you swing to and fro and he looks at you for a moment, trying to decipher your thoughts, for these are not the words he expected from you.
YOU ARE READING
Forever's Last Day by LeeChunsaFanfiction
"If you love him, set him free." But will YOU? Really? Author's Note: This was supposedly a drabble but then turned into a one-shot, lol. I wrote this 5-6 years back and this is part of 3 one-shots. However, I think it can stand-alone without the ot...