20. the good girl's secret

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A/N

WARNING: this chapter deals with suicide and may be triggering.

Thank you for reading!

Picture is of Serena. Hope you guys like this chapter.

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"He became a good person for you... You're afraid of commitment. You don't want to be hurt again. You think Archer doesn't know how to love? Think again. You have no idea what love is." Carter's words from last night keeps repeating in my head.

          "You saw what you wanted to see."

What exactly did he mean by that? I hate this - not knowing. It's driving me nuts.

"It'll be $20.33," the taxi driver tells me once he stop the car.

I snap back into reality and take out the money from my purse.

"Thank you." I hand him $22. "Keep the change."

I open the door and get out of the car, staring at the all too familiar house in front of me. A creamy tan two story house. Next door was my old house before high school. This street, the front porch, the yard. I still remember playing around and running around with Serena, laughing together.

It's been almost one year since I've been here. Everything felt
like it happened yesterday.

With a deep breathe in and out, I slowly walk forward and into their front porch.

"Okay, Chloe. You can do this," I try to encourage myself to ring the doorbell. With a few seconds of hesitating and self-doubt, I finally lift up my hand and ring the doorbell.

I inhale and exhale once again, wanting to release all my nervousness.

The doorknob twist then the door open, revealing Jennifer. She looks the same aside from the bags under her eyes. She smile brightly at me, surprised to see me in a long time.

"Chloe! What a surprise." She opens the door all the way and reach in for a hug. I hug her back. A second later, she let go and pull back.

"I'm so glad to see you. How are you doing?" She chirp.

I smile. "I'm great," I lied. "How are you?"

"You know, same old same old." She wave her hand and invite me in, "Come in."

"You must be here to see Serena," she state the obvious.

"How is she?" I follow after Jennifer.

"She's doing a lot better these past few months. Thank god the doctors let me bring her home. I didn't want her to be stuck in that plain white room of theirs all day."

We walk through the living room.

"That's great," was all I could say. I'm too nervous to even function right now. It's been a year since I've seen Serena. I can't help but feel guilty.

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