Chapter 42 - Going Back

1.9K 59 2

The next couple of days with Bucky were strange. There were times when he'd spend hours writing on sheets of lined paper, this look of determination on his face as if he were in a hurry. I asked him about it once, and he simply ignored me until I went back inside. I say that I went back inside because he was always writing on the penthouse. I'd watch him sometimes whenever he never noticed me there, and there would be points where he'd stop writing and look at the view of the busy streets for a few minutes before getting back to writing.

As if I wasn't stressed enough, Bucky was driving me insane.

The main reason for my restlessness was gathering the guts to go over to SHIELD and ask them for help. I ask them for help. In order to do that, I had to fix whatever dark air was hanging around me and Steve. And to be honest, I have gotten to the point where I'm not really sure why I don't want to see him anymore, or rather, why the idea made my stomach churn. I was still yet to figure out if it was good stomach churning or bad stomach churning.

Regardless, here I stood again at the doors leading out to the balcony , staring at the back of him as he wrote away. With a heavy sigh, I abandoned all my mental plans to get his attention and leaned off the door frame. "I'm going to go speak to Alex." I announced, getting an incoherent grumble in return. I rolled my eyes and walked away, making my way out the penthouse and then downstairs to Alex's apartment. He had been ignoring since he found out I murdered the Shadow soldier in "cold blood". He was even more annoyed at the fact that I didn't have control over my emotions. In all honesty, I think his anger is irrational.

Before I even lifted my hand to knock on his door, I heard him shout. "Go away, Chris."
Had I not been trying to reconcile things like an adult, I would have replied the way Ana replied to Elsa in the Disney movie Frozen. But I was here as a grown up to fix something more than Alex not wanting to build a snowman with me.
"Alex, hear me out." I replied with a frown, fiddling with the zip of my leather jacket. When I didn't get a reply, I considered walking away but then I thought better of it. If I was his queen, what right did he have to tell me to go away? "Alex, if you don't open this door, I'm going to fucking tear it down." I spoke again, this time with more authority and much louder. There was silence for a few seconds before the door flung open, and Alex stood there with a bored expression on his face.

"You're being a dickhead." I said to him before he had the chance to speak. "Do you think I know what I'm doing, like you? I had no idea I was royalty and until two weeks ago. I don't even know the full extent of my power yet. I didn't want to kill that soldier, I mean, I did because who wouldn't? He killed a whole family, and most likely many others, but I had no intention of murdering him, and before I knew it I just did it. So, you being angry at me is stupid." I ranted, adjusting my blouse. "You said you're my guardian. Then guide me. Help me realise my potential, or face bitter consequences of a broken empire." I do finished off, huffing with pride and flicking a strand of my hair over my shoulder in a dramatic manner.

Alex stared at me blankly before sighing heavily and stepping aside. "You're stubborn, do you know that?"
"Well, what else is a queen supposed to do?" I replied, walking into his apartment. Before we could discuss anything else, I turned around to face him and my unbreakable facade very quickly dropped and was replaced with worry. "Are Natasha and Clint okay?"
"Yeah, they are," Alex nodded before pointing to the couch. "I wanted to speak to you about that actually." He added in a small murmur, leading me to the couch before we both took a seat. "I wanted to explain about the mind control thing."
"Right." I nodded then spoke again before he could continue. "You mean what they did? I guess if they were controlled, they aren't really to blame, are they? It wasn't their thoughts." Alex looked at me with an expression that was definitely against what I was saying, a small sigh leaving his lips.
"We can't plant ideas into people's heads. We take what's already there." He said quietly. I rose a brow, prompting him to continue. "Meaning that The Shadow that took control of their minds only used ideas they already had and strengthened them enough for them to act."

Her Shield | s. rogers [✔]Read this story for FREE!