TALE:a story. All language originated from nature, in our attempts to explain it to ourselves and others. The first tale was "How the peacock got its tail".The first tall tale? " How the giraffe got it's long neck".
TALENT: the ability to do something particularly well. This is always only Ient whether you are born with it or not. This is most fully revealed/proven through the literary device of tragedy. A little talent goes a long way so long as the lenders don't come-a-calling, to take away your calling.
TELEOLOGICAL: originating from the T.V.. Divine doctrine that television has a hidden goal or purpose in its nature. The principle proof being McCluhan's statement that "the medium is the message", we are what we watch.
TEMPERATURE: always temporary.
TEMPLE: a place of worship which leads to God, God's sanctuary on earth. Our temples lead to our mind, our minds the way to God, the holiest of holy places. The mind is the temple of God, a sacred place on the way to bliss, knowledge of the unknowable.
TERMINUS: death, the end is in all of us. Luckily, it is only a term. Also that a word can only signify, never is.
THEATRE OF WAR: life is a stage and so what's more real and theatricat than war. Reflects the modern notion (given sophisticated killing technology, masses of third world peoples) that war isn't hell but something to be watched on C.N.N. Yes, a theatre of the absurd but that's already been done. Another theatrical aspect lies at the bottom of war's spirit. Most soldiers go to war only because they truly believe they won't get killed. lt is a theatrical and imaginary ploy played by the mind and then later fortified on the stage. (see Casualty)
THEOLOGY: THE ology, the most important ology, science.
“THE REAL MCCOY”: the real, true thing or item. Originates from the feuding between the Hatfield family and the McCoys in Tennessee. Each clan had so many distant relatives, cousins, half-cousins, illegitimate children, that it was very hard to reek revenge with any measure of exactness. When the Hatfield's did kill a McCoy and they verified it, they " got the real McCoy".
THIN BLUE LINE: the police. Forming a blue uniformed line they are those that protect us from the forces of dog eat dog (do dogs really eat dogs?), barbaric, lawless savagery. As Ortega y Gassett, a south American who has experienced and witnessed many breaks in this thin line has so pessimistically quipped, "Law is born of the despair of human nature." Human nature lights human nature, this seems to be the sentence of man, an always tripping over himself.
THOUGH: a thought interrupted.
THOUGHT: what happens when we think, the refuse of thinking, it's leftover. Holy in origin, a thought is of mysterious origins. When we say “a thought just came to me.”, we are confirming the fact of its divinity, our ignorance of where it came from.
TIT FOR TAT: blow for blow, an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. An equal exchange, the earliest form of economic commerce, bartering. A variation of the
earlier " tip for hat ", when it was the custom for men to wear their hats out on the
town and check them at the door.
Titillating: exciting, so exciting that the ends of ones tits harden, the nipples firming.
TO LET SOMEONE DOWN: to disappoint. Literally, to bring someone down to earth, to release from light, idealistic promises. But usually gently, lightly.
TOOTHPICK: a small wooden splinter used to remove food from between the teeth. Though we would use only one on many teeth, it is still grammatically incorrect to ask for a few “teethpicks”. Some idiot savants (idiots that save useless information) are known to be able to say how many toothpicks a tree contains. A famous surrealist sculpture titles “the return”, tried to find the tree again by building it with toothpicks. The rise of the lowly toothpick is a tale of the origins of modern artificial and created demand. A young New Englander persuaded a restaurateur to put them on his table. Soon business was booming as people only wanted to go to restaurants which had toothpicks and thus were more upscale. Strange but true, man is such a fickle creature!
TORPID: inactive or slugglish (a Tory?). ls a torpedo really torpid? lf not why isn't it called a "torrentido", a strong and violent, tumultuous stream of something?
TORT: a legal term for a wrongful act which leads to the injury of another party; their reputation, property, person or the like... and for which one will be tortured by having to pay grossly inflated amounts of compensation. Somethingtwisted, crooked, dubious. Like the German "torte", a cake made without flour, very dubious indeed. Most parties respond with a law suit of their own, this is what we
call to "retort".
TOW: to take by the toe and move.
TRANSLATED: to get across but too late. Poetry as Frost said, “is what is lost in translation”. lt is missing the first understanding, what has fallen into the river off the bridge into the water which is the always. What has been translated is missing something of the earlier impulse which lives in the original words.
TRANSPORT: the game of driving large trucks all the way across the country without falling asleep or stopping to go to the washroom. lt gives meaning to the thought that “sport is a way of fortifying national unity”.
TRANSVESTITE: a cross dresser. Usually a man who dresses as a woman. Are they particularly attracted to vests.
TRAPEZE: the trap (falling) can be avoided with ease.
TRIFLE: something not worth the bother, unimportant. A trutfle isn't worth all the trouble finding it, so why isn't it called a trifle?
TRIVIAL: not important. Literally meaning, “three ways”. Where 3 roads met many people would usually gather and chat, their talk was usually unimportant, trivial.
TROUBLE-SHOOTER: a modern day gunslinger. A hit man, assassin.
T-SHIRT: a shirt that looks like the letter T, neckless usually.
TUNA: a fish originally stored in a tun, a large cask on a fishing boat With mass marketing, tuns soon became tins. Of Note: “you can tuna piano but you can't tuna fish.” -- Joe Walsh.
TUNISIA: the peculiar condition of forgetting you ate tuna fish the evening before when you visit the doctor for botchellism the next morning. (see SALMONELLA)
YOU ARE READING
The Idiot's DictionaryNon-Fiction
"When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone. "It means just what I choose it to mean - neither more or less." "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many different things." "The question is," said Hu...