Hi everyone!! :DD Now that I've updated, I'm pretty sure my ranking will go down... So, please tell your friends about my story! Please? O.O I will <3 u forever!!! The picture at the side is that of Willow's memory... And please bear with me! It'll start to get interesting from Chapter 5, I promise!!!
Update (9/1/16): Reading my author's notes back when I was merely 14 makes me cringe so badly
Nothing interesting happened on the first few days of school. To be fair, that is an understatement. Nothing happened at all during the first week -first few months - of school. It’s currently the last week of October. Most people have already started preparing for Halloween. But I, for one, am not.
I don't celebrate Halloween because I don’t have anyone – excluding Gray – to celebrate it with me, so what’s the point? Halloween only makes me reminisce about all the fun times my sister and I had. I don't want to remember any of that.
It'll only make it worse.
Anyway, what is the point of dressing up and going around the neighbourhood and collecting sweets and candies and eating it until we get cavities? Waste of time, money and energy.
Or, at least, that's what I tell myself.
So, I’m just going to sit around, doing nothing – as always! – At home on October the thirty-first. Doing nothing, like I always do, as memories haunt me, never-endingly in my dreams, crashing my life over and over and over again. And it makes me literally cry myself to sleep every single night.
Right now, I’m curled up into Gray on the couch in my living room, watching a bittersweet movie entitled ‘The Last Song’, a movie adaptation of Nicholas Sparks’ novel of the same name. It’s so bittersweet, that I found myself crying never-endingly when the movie ended. Gray used his thumb to wipe away my tears.
“Aww! Willow tree! Don’t cry!”
But that made me cry even more than I was. Why? Well, it’s because Ronnie’s (that’s the main character) dad’s death reminds me of the accident and the loss that I have. Not a pleasant moment but I have to endure it. Somehow.
“Willow tree…” he cooed into my ear.
I tried my best to stifle my sobs but it was useless. The tears and sobs just keep on coming. I guess… I guess I can’t stop because my loss is too much for a seventeen-year-old. I buried my face in his shirt. My tears wetted his shirt greatly.
“Shush… Shush…” he tried cooing again.
With my face still buried in his shirt, my tears stopped spilling out. Instead, I just sobbed like there’s no tomorrow, sobbed ‘til my throat is sore, sob ‘til I can’t stop. I shut my eyes as tightly as I could manage. I felt Gray caressing my hair oh-so-gently. Somehow, a wave of calmness rushed over me.
“Gray…” I whispered, my voice breaking a little.
“Hmm?” he mumbled back, still caressing my hair gently.
I stifled my sobs, this time, with more success. I started breathing in his scent. My breaths were still quick – not sobs – but I’ve stopped crying.
Tonight’s going to haunt me terribly. It’d be a miracle if I can even squeeze in three hours of sleep. I wanted to crawl into bed and fall asleep, but at the same time, I don’t want to. I miss my family. I miss all those times we had together.