Part 18 Beyond Words

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MODEUS AND I WALK ALONG THE STEEL FENCED PATH deeper into the cave where darkness is held back by only a few lights blazing against the walls. The rock formations gradually change to milky white crystals that dangle above us like icicles. The beauty pulls me in like a raging fire in the middle of the dark.

"You're drawn to it because of your telepathy," Modeus says. "Makes your gift stronger—easier."

"Is that why I could hear Steve?"

Modeus stops and turns to me. "You heard him?"

I nod. "Yes."

Modeus smiles proudly. "Your gift impresses me. You must tell me how long you've been able to do it."

The memory of my father brings a familiar pang of emptiness. "You know, I think I've had too much to drink and I don't want to get all serious right now."

"You don't seem to want to share your real self with me. Why is that?"

"I just met you Modeus and to be honest, all of this is a bit overwhelming."

"What overwhelms you?" he asks.

The air must be thinner in this part of the cave. Either that or the shots are finally knocking me on my ass. "Hearing conversations in my head, you fucking me without a condom, your eyes turning red. Take your pick."

Looking perplexed, Modeus takes a step back. "You have a gift that you've been hiding from the world and here you get to experience that freedom in ways you've never imagined. Me fucking you without a condom does not scare me." His deep brown eyes relax on me in a way that makes me melt. He takes a step towards me and gently grabs my hand. "But it clearly scares you and I'm sorry." He leans in and kisses my cheek. "And much like your telepathy, my eyes are something incomprehensible to most, so I wait until I'm comfortable to share it."

Understanding completely what he means about sharing something so intimate, I look into those eyes gazing upon me and lighten up. "I'm sorry, it's just that..." Oh, God, here it goes. "This whole transcending thing is new to me, well, it's a long story and like I said, I'm just having a hard time with everything happening so fast."

"I pushed you out of your comfort zone Brenda. That's what real change is. You move past what's comfortable and stretch into new experiences. And it doesn't always feel right. You have to work with it—surrender to it."

I look down at the wooden plank strip holding us off the cave floor and take a deep breath. I attempt to say something, but the words do not form.

"Let it go, girl," he says. "Stop fighting it. Be with me."

I struggle a moment more and decide to give in just a little. "How long have you been able to transcend?"

Modeus smiles. "I love that you call it that...transcend..." He takes a moment more and looks off in the distance. "Forever. It's a unique gift and not everyone has it the same around me, except for you."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," he says. "You and I can transcend with each other and others with the gift like Steve, but I must admit, I wasn't sure whether you could hear the thoughts of others not speaking directly to you. That is something more advanced."

"Maybe it's the alcohol," I laugh. "Can you hear the thoughts of people who don't have the gift?"

"For the most part I can, but I'll admit that's not always fun. All the mindless chatter gets annoying. Soon you'll be able to do that too."

My heart sinks to my feet. Freddy was in that room and God only knows what he was thinking. "So you heard the thoughts of everyone in the office?"

Modeus stops with a worrisome pause. "I heard only what I wanted." He smiles. "When I came through Richard's door your thoughts, in particular, were clear in my mind and of course I couldn't pass up the opportunity to get in that head of yours. However, I couldn't hear from that point forward and wasn't sure what you were thinking. You seem to be able to block certain things from me."

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