"I love you"
I'm frozen in shock, it's like I'm paralyzed.
Ashton Bryce Hayden has told me he loves me, and I don't know what to say...
"Thanks..." I give a soft smile "I think I should get going, I'll see you later, babe" I kiss his cheek and get up.
"I'll drive you"
"No, it's okay, I can walk" I put on a smile.
As I walk home, I try to sort myself out.
Why didn't I say "I love you" back?
Do I love him?
I like him, but I don't know if I love him...
Do I want to love him?
Do I really even know what love is?
Love means everything and nothing... You can say you love something or someone but not actually mean it or you could say you love someone/something and it would mean the world to you.
Love is such an overused word.
I love this, I love that–but it could just be a word you say when you like something that is better great or good.
It could also be a word that you say when you truly, deeply, madly, have a passion for someone/something...
Am I in love with anything? Could I use the word love and actually mean it?
"Hey! Snap out of it!" My sister flicks my head
"Ow!" I rub the spot she hit
"What's up with you? This past week you've been out of it–Are you pregnant?!?"
"No, Delilah, I'm not... I'm just thinking"
"Are you sure there's nothing wrong? Even Heather called to make sure you were okay"
"Yeah, I'm fine, I just have a lot on my mind..."
"Is Ashton forcing you to do something you don't want to?"
In matter of fact, I've been a bit distant from him lately...
"No! Delilah! Everything is fucking fine! Just leave me be!" I storm off.
I couldn't help it, she was aggravating me.
"Look I'm sorry" I hear her say on the other side of my door.
"It's fine," I open my door "I just need some air, I'll see you later"
I've been taking walks a lot lately, it helps me think a bit more.
I know I shouldn't be making such a big deal about this situation, but I've never had a boy love me before, and I don't want to waste my time if it's an unmeaningful love.
I turn to see Ashton with a smile on his face.
"Oh... Hey Ashton"
"Are we over or something? You haven't been talking to me and you don't return my texts or calls..."
"What? No! I've just been thinking a lot lately..."
"Holy shit! Did I get you pregnant?" He asks, looking as if I'm holding a gun to his head.
"No, you didn't."
"I-I just need to clear my head of things, it's like my head it all cloudy and there's so much going on inside my brain..."
"Do you want to talk about it?" He asks, squeezing my hand.
"No, it's okay, I think I'm going to just continue to walk now" I give a fake smile
"Okay, I'll see you later" He kisses my lips.
"I love you" He smiles
I give him a smile back.
Do I love Ashton Bryce Hayden?