Diary of a Confused&Frustrated Teenager

February 11, 2012

Hey guys. Well people that would actually read this. This is not going to be a story, its jus' going to be a diary for me to share to the public, I guess. I hate writting in a notebook, cause it jus' makes me more frustrated, because I have no one to talk to.

I have alot of reasons on why I want to start doing this. One being, I need to get things that I keep bottled up in my chest, out. Another, I think people could relate to me, maybe, and then might want to talk, because I don't really have anyone to talk to :l

So, I guess enough with that. My name for the diary will be Marie. I don't want to use my real name, although it is on my profile. I feel if I use my name, the whole thing that is inside my head will become real, and I'm scared.

February 11, 2012

First entry, so I don't really know what to put, but I guess I should start with all the new things going on in my life.

I'm going to be doing track&field for my highschool and that has been overtaking my whole life so far, and I jus' started. I find it really awesome though. There was a senior girl and I had to race her, and she's been doing track for four years rather me, I only did it one year and quit for three and restarted, but yeah. We tied. Thats crazy, although I know I'm fast for a girl. Three years ago, I ran the four hundred meter dash in one minute.

Uh, I'm finally going to be in a pre-pointe class, for ballet and I'm extremely happy. It took me ten years almost eleven to get were I am. I have classes on Tuesday's and Thrusday's. My first class was last Tuesday and the teacher said she loved my legs and she wanted them. Haha, I keep hearing that, but I don't see whats so special about them. They look like a amizon womens legs. Thick and strong -_____-. I want them thin and long. But, I won't ever get that, will I? No.

Uh, I guess this is one of the main reason's why I started this. I think I'm bisexual, I think. I'm scared that I am, cause I know my parents will never like it. They won't accept it, although I think I'm starting to, but not to sure. I think I started to accept it, when I saw this girl, she was and is really pretty and she came inside the bathrrom at my school and smiled. Then it started to happen everyday before school started though. And I find myself growing a uh.... you know what, a crus- yeah on her. Only thing is, she has a boyfriend.. :l I don't know if I'm jus' curious or if I really am. I cry at night cause I'm that scared. I told one of my friends, and she said she didn't mind, but I think she does.

I questioned myself a couple months ago, and decided no I wasn't. Then, this happens. I have a crush on a football player, at my school, but I ____ on a girl... :l Not so hot. Um.. yeah.

I guess thats it really. I'm write another entry if something happens, that I think you can relate too.

Love&Rainbows for now.

Marie <33

R.I.P Whitney Houston