~Ed's Best Friend~
It has been four weeks since I was crying my eyes out in bed. Four weeks with a horrible pain in my chest. Four weeks without seeing him, Four weeks without feeling his skin, four weeks without his eyes, four weeks of missing him.
The First two weeks were the worst. Everything made me think of him; a teacup, my guitar, that black shirt of him I accidentally packed along with my clothes... everything! I even tried to call him but he didn't pick up the phone. And I really can't blame him for that.
My mum was worried sick about me, she wanted me to get some medication so I could sleep a little more since I looked like a zombie. Maura also visited me with ice cream, trying to make me feel better but nothing really helped. I needed him...
The worst thing is that I'm in a fight with my own mind almost all the time. It's like my brain parted up in two, one part knows I made a good decision and the other feels miserable and wants to cry all the time.
Eventually it's all my fault.
After the second week I decided there had to change something, I started with wearing some normal clothes again instead of sweaters and leggings and started with jogging in the park every morning before my classes began. I have to admit it made me feel a lot better but it didn't take away everything.
In the third week I did what I should've done earlier; I started writing songs again. These sort of situations are the ones everybody gets their inspiration from and so did I. I finished a Total of three songs in one week, a personal record that took away some of the pain.
The last week was probably the best. I went out with Maura to get coffee and had a great time, but the thing making me smile today is that I'm turning 19 in two days. And since Maura told me she's going to organize the best party I could've ever wished for I'm more than excited.
It has been four weeks since I talked to Niall in that hallway. Four weeks without her, four weeks with that emptiness I have been experiencing
The weird thing is that I actually haven't felt anything at all, it was just emptiness. I didn't laugh at Louis' jokes like I normally would've done, I didn't get mad when Zayn borrowed some clothes of mine without asking. I didn't cry... It was just empty. I didn't even feel comfortable on stage, it was like I didn't even enjoy it.
Is this the feeling of losing someone you love?
The guys have been giving me some worried stares, but know me to good and didn't start asking question. They left me alone and I guess I needed that.
Today is one of those days I spent lying in bed with my Music on the highest volume as I play air guitar. At this moment Music is a better drug than alcohol.
'Do I wanna know? If this feeling flows both ways, sad to see you go, was sorta hoping that you'd stay, baby we both know,that the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day' I say along with the Arctic Monkeys. Why does every freaking song make me think about her? It's so damn frustrating.
The thought of going back to London makes me nauseous . Why can't we just stay here until we start the European leg of the tour? What if I'm in London and run into her? I can't see her
I was so lost in my own thoughts and the Music blasting through the room that I didn't notice Zayn entering the room.
I shriek when I notice him standing in front of the bed.
"Zayn, what the hell man!" I say shocked, my hand reaching for the volume button to turn the Music off.
"Sorry mate, didn't want to scare you!" He smiles weakly, sitting down next to me on the bed.
"So what's up?" I ask.
"I've been worried about you!" He admits with a sigh. I don't really know how to respond so I just keep my mouth shut. "I know this is all very hard for you, and I totally get it! But you can't just stay like this! You can talk to me you know!"
"I know" I simply say. "I just don't know, I still love her so much and I actually want to leave this place right now and find her, but it's just impossible. But I also know this is all so damn stupid, I still can't get the image of her kissing Adam out of my mind and a part of me doesn't even want to forgive her. It's like she's messing with my mind even though she isn't even here!" Frustrated I throw my hands up in the air and let myself fall into the pillows.
Zayn seems deep in thought, staring out of the window. "You need to get out of this vibe. So, there's this party we've been invited for and you're coming with us without any resistance!" With that he stands up and walks out of the room.
He's right, I need to get out of this.
"You're ready?" Maura asks with a smirk, a blindfold in her hand. Don't you only get blindfolded when there's a surprise party planned for you? Why do I need a blindfold when I already know that there's a party?
"I guess?" I say with a giggle as Maura wraps the piece of fabric around my head. "Why do I need to get blindfolded again?"
"Because otherwise this isn't so much fun!"
"Right" I laugh as she guides me into her car.
"Here we are!" Maura cheers. I expect to get blinded by bright lights but instead it's just as dark in the room as I could see with the blindfold. I want to ask Maura what the hell is going on here but I get interrupted by a familiar tune ,blasting through the dark room.
Bright lights break trough the dark and at the end of the room are standing the four boys I spent my teenage years with.
"She's dropping out of school 'cause she don't need the grade,
The colors in her hair don't seem to fade." Luke starts.
For a moment I'm frozen in place but after that I immediately tackle Maura into a hug. "Thank you, oh my god" I thought there was no way they could make it on time.
"Yes they finished the UK part of the tour and they all decided to come" She cheers.
'They finished the UK part' Just when I'm about to tell myself to not even think about him being here I spot a pair of green eyes staring at me from across the room. My smile fades immediately as I break the hug.
YOU ARE READING
Ed's Best FriendFanfiction
*COMPLETED* "I hate you" Those were the only three words needed to change my entire life! Oh yeah and "you want to be my opening act?"was also really effective.