I Love You

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Spencer's P.O.V.

It was early in the morning and I was curled up in someone's arms. I felt them stir and I quickly pulled myself from their arms sitting on the side of the bed. I let my feet dangle for a minute before hopping off, making my way to the bathroom. I flipped on the light and didn't recognize the reflection. I was a complete stranger to myself. My face was mangled with scars, my body was thin and I could feel my ribs. None of me was the same and it scared me.

I turned on the water from the tap, splashing my face trying to get off the makeup. It wasn't much but it still hide what was underneath. My scars, the things I have to live with the rest of life. The things I will have to explain over and over again, experience the pain over and over again because of people's curiosity. Maybe I can hide them. But what would that do? I can't hide from my past, only try to move past and experience what I can now.

"Hey bug." I heard a soft familiar voice and I smiled turning my head towards the door. "Hi Mani." Normani returned the smile, grabbing the facecloth from the counter. "Can I help?" I nodded siting down on the bathtub. Normani grabbed the cloth placing it under the water to get it wet and slowly started wiping off the makeup and small amounts of blood. "Reminds me of the night we found you." Her smile faded a little. She brought her hand up to my forehead and slowly began carefully cleaning around my stitches. "Does that hurt?" I shook my head. Normani put the cloth down and took my hands in hers. "Can I ask you something?" I hesitantly nodded my head. She took a deep breath, "Did they hurt you?" The question hit me hard but I didn't want to show weakness. "No." I looked up into Normani's eyes and she could tell I was sugar coating it. "I'm not going to push you. I want you to feel comfortable telling us anything. Just know we're all here for you baby. I promise." I forced a smile. "Thanks Mani."

Normani's eyebrows creased together but softened. "Talk when you're ready baby, okay?" She squeezed my hands and I gave her a reassuring smile. "I will." Mani pulled me up off the side of the tub and looked at me with sad eyes. "What is it?" I gave her a confused look. She looked like she was going to burst into tears. "Can I hug you?" I felt a frown form on my lips. "Why can't you?" She wiped at her eyes quickly shrugging her shoulders. "I don't know. I just can't b-believe you're a-actually here." Her voice broke and tears fell down her cheeks.

I stuck my arms out and Mani flew into them. She held me close crying into my shoulder. "I missed you Spence. You have no idea how hard we fought for you." She pulled back, giving my cheek a quick kiss. "I missed you too." I rested my head on her shoulder rubbing her back. You would think the roles would be reversed but honestly I don't think I have even begun to process what happened. The girls have watched from the outside. They were on the other side of the window looking in, while I had to live every moment.

"Are you hungry? I can order some room service. Or if you want you can take a shower. Or I can wake up the rest of the girls?" Normani keep to my level rubbing my arms softly. "Umm... do you think I could take a shower? I haven't in days. I feel extremely gross." I smiled looking down at my appearance. Mani laughed shaking her head. "Of course sweetheart. Anything for you." She stood up quickly, kissing my forehead before starting the shower. "I'll go and grab you some clothes. Don't get in yet." I nodded, while trying to undue the zipper on the dress. After Camila rescued me I was immediately taken back to the hotel. I barely remember anything other then refusing to get undressed. I wanted to sleep and I guess the girls respected that. I struggled for a minute but eventually got it undone right before Mani came back in with some clothes. "We still had some clothes left at the house and we brought them with us." She handed them over and I gladly took them. "Thank you Mani."

"You got it. Will you be okay by yourself?" I looked towards the shower then back at her. "I should be fine... But do you mind if you left the door open?" I asked sheepishly still feeling a little unsafe with my surroundings but Normani waved it off. "Of course Bug! I'll be right there waiting, how about that?" I smiled and gave her a nod.

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