A/N: So this part of the story; the whole "best friend dying of cancer" thing, is loosely based on events in my life, well, my dad's life. My dad grew up with his best friend who moved away to New York city right after high school and became a broadway actor. He was Tom Sawyer in the broadway show "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" in case you know of him (lol that would be cool) and he had cancer but didn't find out till very late on and he called my Dad down who spent his last little bit with him. He always signed his letters and ended his phone calls to my Dad with "Much love my friend" so that explains the title.

She wasn't breathing....

You ran over to her, "Y/B/F? Y/B/F? Y/B/F?!" You shook her, she didn't move. "Wake up...wake up." You sobbed, you knew she wasn't going to wake.

"Dan! Dan!" You were on the floor, still sobbing as you called out for Dan. He came running in.

Dan took one look at you and just knew, "It's okay love, she's in a better place now." he walked over and got on the floor next to you.

"What do we tell Raine?" You suddenly realized you two had to break the news to her.

"I'll do it." Dan said as he got up.

"I'll call her sister, that's who Raine goes to." You sniffled and got up as well, you saw her phone on her night stand and picked it up. Thank God Y/B/F didn't lock her phone (also wtf Y/B/F?) You immediately found her sister Macey in her contacts and called her.

You hadn't spoken to Macey in years, she was older that Y/B/F and you by two years, you were never really friends with her. She was nice and all, you had nothing against her, you just weren't friends.

"Hello?" Macey picked up.

"Hey Macey, it's Y/N." You said grimly.

"Why are you calling me from Y/B/F's phone?" She said in a worried tone.


"She's not...? Is she?" Macey gasped.

"Th-this morning." You sniffled.

"...I'm on my way, tell Raine I'll be there by lunch" She sighed and hung up. And like that, you were left alone in the room with your best friend's dead body.


It was the day of the funeral. You had never imagined that you would have to do this. You had been friends with Y/B/F since that first day of kindergarten where you dropped your PB&J and she offered hers to you. Y/B/F was the kindest, funniest, craziest, person that you had ever met and she was gone, just like that.

"Y/N it's alright, you can do this." Dan assured you as you walked into the church.

"I hope so, I'm glad you're here with me." You sighed.

"Wouldn't be anywhere else." He kissed your forehead. You walked into the church and found seats. The preacher who was talking was utterly boring. He didn't do Y/B/F justice, this preacher didn't know her, he didn't have the right to tell about her life to everyone she loved.

It was open casket which kinda freaked you out but you went up to the front to pay your respects like any good friend would.

She looked odd though, it was Y/B/F but it wasn't her her, if you know what I mean. She was so pale and her hands were rested in such an unnatural position, you almost moved them to her sides and off her chest but it's considered socially unacceptable to touch the corpse at a funeral.

"Goodbye Y/B/F." You whispered, and that was the last thing you ever said to her.

After you greeted everyone and talked about Y/B/F a bit you and Dan decided it was time to go, after all, you did have a plane to catch. But Macey stopped you on your way out. She handed you a letter from Y/B/F. You thanked her for the letter but you still had to rush out, you really did have a plane to catch.

Once you got your seats on the plane you took the letter out.

"Dan, these are the last words I'll ever here from Y/B/F. I don't think I can open this." You said as you turned the letter over in your hands.

"That's okay darling, you don't have to if you don't want to. But there must be something in there that she wanted you to know." He rubbed your arm soothingly.

"You're right, it's her last words, I should read it." You began to open the letter. You immediately noticed Y/B/F's terrible attempt at good hand writing which made you laugh, even from the grave she could still make you laugh.

"Dear Y/N,

Well, if you're reading this then I've died. I know I know, stop your sobbing, it's okay. In all seriousness, I'm really going to miss you. You are the most amazing friend anyone could ever ask for. I'm so happy that we got to be friends. Even though I didn't get to spend as much time as I would have liked on this earth, I wouldn't trade our time together for the world. I'm so glad you dropped your sandwich on the cafeteria floor in kindergarten because if it hadn't have been for your clumsiness, we never would have met. We've shared so many great times together so I ask you this one thing. Please, when Raine is old enough, tell her all our stories. Tell her about the time we accidentally blew up the girls bathroom in middle school. Tell her how I snuck you out of detention for a whole month in freshman year. Tell her how you got your crush to place a restraining order on me when we were juniors. Tell her everything, the good and the bad, all of it. I can't be there to tell her and I'm afraid she might forget me. I know she won't forget she had a mother but I fear she will forget who I was and everything I stood for. I know you can do this Y/N, I trust you with this. Until we meet again.

Much Love My Friend,


You smiled through your tears, you had almost forgotten about blowing up that bathroom. It sure had been a crazy ride with Y/B/F, she was really gone. This amazing person was just out your life, forever.

"I take it you're happy you read it?" Dan asked cautiously.

"Yeah, I am."

The Trip of a Lifetime ~ Dan Howell × ReaderRead this story for FREE!