gone girl ━ wroetoshaw ( ✓ )

XVIII. FAITH

dear harry,
i'm so in love with you, i hope you know.
but i'm leaving.
i hope you find it in your heart to forgive me.
i've forgiven you, all the lies, cheating and heartbreak.
all of it.
i forgive you.
i'm sorry we haven't spoken the past few weeks and i know we never will, if you ever see this letter, i'll be gone.
~love faith, your faith
p.s. i love you. after all this time. i'll always love you.

dear vik,
we were always close, weren't we?
i love everyone of your stupid puns and equally shit jokes.
i love every part of your fantastic personality, vikky.
you're amazing.
you're the kindest, nicest, funniest person i've ever met, and ever will meet (except for phil, tobi, manny, lewis, joe, josh and ethan of course.)
but you, ethan, joe, dan and manny got me, you knew where i was coming from, unlike josh, lewis and tobi, they never fully understood what's going on in my fragile ass mind.
i love you, you're like the brother i never had, all of you sidemen
(except harry. and josh - he's my dad.)
~love faith, i love you bro
p.s don't try looking for me, i'll be gone by the time you see this.

dear my babyzingu, ethan
i love you.
i hope you're doing fine, i also hope the gay jokes have died down, they were never ever funny.
i hope the guys have treated you well.
i love your personality.
you were happy, funny, had an amazing sense of humour and an even better laugh.
i miss that stupid laugh.
i know you weren't truly happy much, i hope that's changed.
you, manny, dan, joe and vik always got me, every time harry cheated you guys always got me
(tobi, lewis and josh did too in those frequent times.)
but unlike when harry cheated, tobi, lewis and josh didn't get me when i was depressed, you, joe, dan, manny and vik had been where i was, thank you all so much for being there when no one else was.
i love you, behzyboo.
~love faith, your depressed sister.
p.s i'm gone when you read this.
don't try and reach out.

dear tobi,
hey bro, how's it been?
i love you, i miss you all so much.
i hope you understand why i'm leaving.
you, vik, manny, ethan, dan, joe, lewis and josh always seemed to feel my vibes.
thanks for that.
you're my christian bro.
i love you with all my heart.
i miss your everything (nothing sexual chill!)
~love faith, your fellow christian/church buddy
p.s i'm sorry if my absence has caused you pain.
you'll be okay.
soon i'll be a faint memory.
gone girl is how you'll remember me.

dear josh,
hey daddy zerkaa, it's been a while.
i was never one for the 'daddy' kink, as you know, but you were like a dad and a brother.
i miss you!
i love you!
i'll be gone when you read this, i just wanted to say thanks, thanks for being there whenever, thanks for being there every time he cheated.
every.
single.
time.
stay safe.
i hope you're happy.
~love faith, your sister and daughter
p.s thanks, for everything.

dear jide,
is jide to formal?
sorry, it's jj if it is.
we were never really close, were we?
you never got why i never left harry the first time he cheated.
did you?
tbh i don't get it either.
i did leave, in the end.
are you proud of me?
i know i wasn't your favourite and you weren't mine but i loved you, olajide olatunji.
(as a brother of course, you retard.)
life would be weird without you.
i'm sorry we were never close and we never will be, because i'll be gone.
~love faith, your sister
p.s we're similar, we're both retarded.
me for staying with him and you for...i don't even know

dear simon,
we weren't really close, you hated me for a bit.
i think i grew on you though.
did i?
i did love you, simon.
your shit jokes, everything.
i guess you grew on me.
you were like the brother i kinda got along with.
i got mad every time you made some lame, stupid pedo joke about vik or some half - assed, crap joke about ethan being gay.
he's pansexual.
he likes people for their mind.
whether they are a guy or a girl.
he's gonna kill me for saying that - if he could.
i'll be gone anyway.
i guess the point in this is you were like my brother.
i'm sorry we weren't close.
~love faith, the sister you never seemed to get along with
p.s i'm pretty sure you're actually a good guy.
_________________
these letters from faith will take a while to take their effect because i'm a stupid lazy bitch
~emily