How I feel when I'm around you (System Of A Down)(EN)

Exploding

«Are you sure?» Serj asks while sipping his coffee.

«Yes, if my presence isn't really needed in studio I'd rather stay at home» I reply calmly «so in the meanwhile I'll clean to keep myself busy.»

«We feel guilty for this, you shouldn't act like our maid, we should do the cleaning by ourselves» Shavo kindly protests but I shake my head and he stops.

«I'll do as I already thought and decided, don't worry.»

«As you wish» an obliging John says «and thanks for everything you do for us.»

I hide my suddenly watery eyes. «You're welcome, guys.»

In that right moment I hear a ring and recognize the arrival of the postman, so after a few seconds I go out to empty the mail box; while browsing through the stuff, standing on the doorstep, a smaller envelope slips away and falls silently on the floor, I pick it up and immediately notice how blank it is, no mentions of who sent it and my name is written on it in an unrecognizable calligraphy. Who the hell has sent this? And how the fuck he knows I'm temporarily living here at the guys' house?

I feel the anxiety raising quickly as I open the envelope, trying to be careful and nevertheless tearing it apart, and a small note slides on my hand.

"I know where you are, whore. Your friends won't stop me from avenging the shame you threw on your family and city. J."

My legs start trembling almost uncontrollably but somehow I keep my balance, then I put that note in a pocket and return to the kitchen where I give Serj the new mails, trying to act cool. For now I won't tell the guys anything about that note, I don't want to make them worry also about my stuff when they've got already their stuff to think about, somehow I'll sort this out by myself.

I smile and hug the guys when they go away, then I lock myself inside, close every window on the first floor and pull the curtains, then I feel safe enough to dedicate myself to house chores with alacrity. After the end of the tour de force I just did I get a bit dizzy and lie down on the sofa and suddenly my phone rings; I pick it up and answer without even checking who's calling.

«Nikki here.»

«Nikki, it's me, Shavo!»

«Shavo! What's up?»

«You deserve double thanks as soon as we come back this afternoon!»

«Gosh, and why?»

«We just remembered we'd have Sako, Beno and Rick over this evening and you just saved our asses by cleaning instead of us...»

«Oh, well, I'm glad for this coincidence!»

«Are you okay? Is everything okay there?»

«Yep, everything's alright.» How hard is to act all normal...

«Well, see you later then! Greets from everyone here in studio, especially from Daron.»

I chuckle hearing the guitarist grumbling. «Thanks to everyone. See you later, bye!»

After ending the phone call I lie down again and sigh, thinking about what's coming tonight.

«...so, are you okay?»

It's a warm evening; some of us are inside, while I'm outside on the balcony chatting with Rick and Sako while sipping a Sprite.