[alternatively titled the ambrosia of the gods, eaten by children
hey hey inkdean this is the greek gods thing i was talking about ages ago]
I. HE IS A BOY WITH CORNSILK HAIR AND BLUE EYES AND LIGHTENING AND A SNAKE TONGUE. HE HAS HIS ARMS AROUND GIRLS AT ALL HOURS AND THEY SEEM TO LOVE HIM EVEN AS HE YELLS. HE TELLS HIS GIRLFRIEND HE LOVES HER AND HE TELLS HIS FRIENDS THEY'RE FINE BUT HE'S DONE NO MORE THAN KISS HER ON THE CHEEK IN MONTHS. SHE IS CURVED WITH NEW LIFE AND HE IS CONTORTED WITH ANGER. HE WILL STRIKE YOU DOWN AND HE WILL DESTROY YOU WITH A SINGLE UTTERANCE. I GUESS ALL THIS MEANS HE MIGHT AS WELL BE ZEUS.
II. SHE IS A TEENAGE GIRL WITH THE RESPONSIBILITY OF AN ADULT. SHE HAS BROWN HAIR AND PRETTY EYES BUT HE DOESN'T THINK HER PRETTY ENOUGH. SHE ACTS ANGRY BUT SHE IS JUST BITTER BECAUSE HER BOYFRIEND DOESN'T LOVE HER OR THEIR BABY. SHE PROMISES TO ALWAYS LOVE HIM AND SHE PROMISES TO BE LOYAL. IF SHE LOVES THE BOY WHO MIGHT AS WELL BE ZEUS I GUESS THAT MEANS SHE'S LIKE HERA.
III. HE GRINS, HIS GREEN EYES SPARKLING. GIRLS LOVE HIM, BOYS ENVY HIM. HE IS A WARRIOR SUPREME, A WARRIOR WHO COULD CRUSH YOU AS EASY AS LOVE YOU. HE SWIMS AND HE LAUGHS WITH A SOUND THAT COULD CURE CANCER. HIS MOODS EBB AND FLOW, LIKE THE TIDES OF THE OCEAN. I GUESS THAT MEANS HE'S POSEIDON?
IV. SHE RUNS THROUGH THE CLEARING BAREFOOT, SHE IS TERRIFIED, OH SO SCARED, BECAUSE HER DAUGHTER WHO WAS BORN FAR TOO SOON HAS RUN AWAY FAR TOO QUICKLY, AND SHE FEARS SHE WILL NEVER SEE HER AGAIN. SHE SEARCHES HIGH AND LOW, HER DRESS TANGLING IN THE BRAMBLES OF THE UNDERWORLD. THE PLANTS WITHER AND THE FLOWERS DIE AND STILL, SHE HAS NOT FOUND HER DAUGHTER, HER NOT-QUITE PERSEPHONE, WHICH MEANS SHE ISN'T QUITE DEMETER BUT SHE'S NEARLY THERE.
V. HE IS AN EXPLOSION INCARNATE, LOUD AND ANGRY. HE LOVES THE QUIET GIRL WITH THE KALEIDOSCOPE EYES, EVEN IF THEY ARE YING AND YANG EXCEPT IT DOESN'T WORK BECAUSE THE OPPOSITION IS TOO EXTREME. THEY ARE YING AND YANG WITH A FOOT OF SPACE BETWEEN THEM. HE IS A LOOSE HINGE, A SPARKING WIRE, SOMEONE WHO'S ONLY EVER KNOWN ANGRY AND WILL ONLY EVER BE ANGRY. I GUESS THAT MAKES HIM ARES?
VI. IF YOU DARE DISTURB HER FROM HER WORK SHE WILL GET THE NOT-QUITE HEPHAESTUS TO BUILD MACHINES OF REVENGE THAT SHE'S DESIGNED. HE'S HER ONLY FRIEND, THE ONLY PERSON SHE'S EVER NICE TO. SOMETIMES WHEN MAYBE POSEIDON CLAMBERS OUT OF A POOL, DRIPPING, SHE DROOLS A LITTLE, BUT EVERYONE DOES THAT, SO IT'S ALRIGHT. SHE IS THE TOP OF HER CLASS, ALWAYS BRINGING HER A-GAME AND GETTING STRAIGHT AS. SHE TALKS BACK TO THE TEACHERS AND CORRECTS THEM ON THINGS, SO SHE DEFINITELY ISN'T THEIR FAVOURITE BUT THAT'S FINE WITH HER. SHE IS SO VERY NEARLY ATHENA.
VII. HAVE YOU EVER MET A HAPPY GOD? HE IS THE ONLY ONE YOU'LL EVER KNOW. HE SHINES LIKE SIX THOUSAND SUNS AND HE HAS HIS ARMS WRAPPED AROUND GIRLS AND BOYS ALTHOUGH HE ALWAYS DEFAULTS TO HIS SISTER, HER SILVER OFFSETTING HIS GOLD. HE CAN HEAL YOU WITH A TOUCH AND SERENADE YOU WITH A SONG BUT HE IS BEST SUITED FOR SHINING, SINCE HIS SMILE IS WIDE AND WHITE AND HIS HAIR REFLECTS THE SUN IN ALL DIRECTIONS. HE IS A GLASS PRISM REFRACTING RAINBOWS IN ALL DIRECTIONS, SO I THINK THAT MAKES HIM APOLLO.
VIII. HER HAIR IS SILVERY WHITE AND IT FALLS DOWN HER BACK, REFLECTS HER BROTHER'S SHINE LIKE HOW THE MOON REFLECTS THE SUN'S LIGHT. HER BREASTS ARE FULL MOONS AND HER HIPS ARE CRESCENTS, AND ALTHOUGH SHE IS A SIREN, AN ENCHANTRESS, SHE HAS SWORN TO LOVE NO MAN AND KISS NO LIPS. SHE RUNS WITH HER WOLVES, GIRLS WITH RAZOR SHARP TEETH AND SMIRKS. SHE JOKES THAT SHE IS ARTEMIS BUT I THINK MAYBE SHE ACTUALLY IS?
IX. HE IS ALL HEAT AND STRENGTH, ALTHOUGH YOU WILL RARELY SEE HIM. HIS HANDS SHAKE AND HE HAS TO MOVE, MOVE, MOVE, OR ELSE HE WILL EXPLODE. HE FIDDLES WITH BITS OF WIRE, HE SKETCHES MODELS AND IDEAS FOR MACHINES THAT WILL REVOLUTIONISE THE WORLD. AND MAYBE HE LIMPS, BUT HE COULD BURN YOUR FACE OFF AND WRECK YOUR LIFE WITH A WORD AND A FLAME, AND HE THREATENS THAT HE IS A SON OF HEPHAESTUS BUT I THINK IT'S MORE LIKELY THAT HE'S HEPHAESTUS HIMSELF.
X. SHE SITS OH SO QUIET IN THE CORNER, HER EYES SPARKLING WITH HUNDREDS OF COLOURS. SHE IS SULTRY, SHY, SHE CAN WEAVE WORDS THAT FEEL LIKE HONEY DRIPPING ON YOUR TONGUE. SHE IS BEAUTY INCARNATE, WITH CLEAR CARAMEL SKIN, WAVY HAIR AND A CURVY BODY. SHE LOVES WITH THE PASSION OF SIX THOUSAND SUNS. SHE WILL WHISPER INTO YOUR SKIN THAT SHE IS APHRODITE AND SHE IS PROBABLY RIGHT.
XI. HE SPRINTS AROUND, HIS CURLY HAIR WHIPPING IN THE WIND AND HE GRINS AS HE RUNS AS HE LOVES IT, IT MAKES IT FEEL FREE. BUT HE HATES IT WHEN THE OTHERS PUSH LETTERS INTO HIS HAND AND WHISPER WHERE TO TAKE IT BECAUSE GODDAMNIT, HE IS NOT THEIR MESSENGER OWL. HE'S KINDA LIKE HERMES, IN THAT ASPECT. HE IS YOUNGER THAN THEM AND THEY TREAT HIM AS SUCH, BUT HE IS NOT HAPPY ABOUT THIS BECAUSE C'MON, IT'S ONLY A YEAR.
XII. HE GRINS AT THE CROWDS AS THEY SWARM HIS HOUSE, THE PARTY GOD ADMIRING HIS PARTY GOERS. HE LEANS MORE AND MORE TO THE SIDE AS THE NIGHT PROGRESSES, THE ALCOHOL TURNING HIM INTO THE LEANING TOWER OF PIZA, HE HAS PARTIES WITH POUNDING MUSIC THAT GIVES YOU POUNDING HEADACHES, AND HE IS NEARLY DIONYSUS.
XIII. SHE DIDN'T MEAN FOR THIS TO GET THIS BAD, SHE DIDN'T MEAN TO LEAVE THE NEARLY-GODS AND GODESSES, BUT THE PARTY BOY WAS DEEMED MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE FIRE GIRL, I MEAN, THEY HAVE A FIRE BOY ANYWAY. SHE IS WARM AND YOUNG, YOUNGER THAN THE MESSENGER, DESPITE WHAT HE SAYS. SHE IS TRYING SO HARD TO HOLD EVERYONE TOGETHER BUT HER PARENTS ARE ARGUING AND HER SIBLINGS ARE SCREAMING AND ALL HER FRIENDS HAVE BANSIHED HER AND SO SHE IS CLUTCHING AT EMPTY AIR, SHE IS PRACTICALLY HESTIA, IN THAT ASPECT.
